tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-67057188457789881502024-02-19T00:10:15.456-08:00The World's OmbudsmanJonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.comBlogger40125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-32073137287959266922012-03-27T15:34:00.006-07:002012-03-27T16:07:39.218-07:00Current Events Ombudsman: Trayvon Martin and the Rush to Judgment<!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:worddocument> <w:view>Normal</w:View> <w:zoom>0</w:Zoom> <w:punctuationkerning/> <w:validateagainstschemas/> <w:saveifxmlinvalid>false</w:SaveIfXMLInvalid> <w:ignoremixedcontent>false</w:IgnoreMixedContent> <w:alwaysshowplaceholdertext>false</w:AlwaysShowPlaceholderText> <w:compatibility> <w:breakwrappedtables/> <w:snaptogridincell/> <w:wraptextwithpunct/> <w:useasianbreakrules/> <w:dontgrowautofit/> </w:Compatibility> <w:browserlevel>MicrosoftInternetExplorer4</w:BrowserLevel> </w:WordDocument> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml> <w:latentstyles deflockedstate="false" latentstylecount="156"> </w:LatentStyles> </xml><![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 10]> <style> /* Style Definitions */ table.MsoNormalTable {mso-style-name:"Table Normal"; mso-tstyle-rowband-size:0; mso-tstyle-colband-size:0; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-parent:""; mso-padding-alt:0in 5.4pt 0in 5.4pt; mso-para-margin:0in; mso-para-margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.0pt; font-family:"Times New Roman"; mso-ansi-language:#0400; mso-fareast-language:#0400; mso-bidi-language:#0400;} </style> <![endif]--> <p class="MsoNormal">Why do we do this all the damn time? How come every 4-5 years something happens and we turn it into a Racial Event without letting the facts come out? It’s the most predictable, depressing process. White person allegedly commits crime against black person, racial connotations are implied by the press. As tension heightens, we roll out the aging civil rights figures (an increasingly archaic and unnecessary class of pundit) to dreamweave a narrative where the United States has not changed racially in 50 years. Others, increasingly shrill, compete to be the most outraged and anyone who disagrees is a racist and an idiot.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">So now, as with all of these Racial Events, the Trayvon Martin case has reached a point where it is nearly impossible to talk rationally about it. But its possible for TWO.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">1. The Specific Narrative</p> <p class="MsoNormal">On February 26<sup>th</sup>, 2012, Trayvon Martin was killed by George Zimmerman, a man who says he acted in self-defense but who may have been an over-zealous (and racist) neighborhood watch captain. He was not arrested. By March 21<sup>st</sup>, Al Sharpton had organized a rally and by March 23, President Obama was commenting on the murder.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">When a murder becomes a symbol of a broader systemic issue – in this case, racist treatment by police and unfair stereotyping of black youth by society in general –such attention risks swallowing the event itself. The media uses inflammatory language to get ratings and page views, the Jesse Jacksons and Al Sharptons of this world swoop in, and people on facebook and twitter frantically update their feeds, increasingly outraged. During the process (indeed, in order for this process to work) the unfortunate people actually involved in the incident are reduced to caricatures –<span style=""> </span>oversimplified manifestations of good and evil – in the story that the participating public has constructed for them. Trayvon Martin the human becomes Trayvon Martin the symbol – the innocent 17 year old black kid returning from the store where he bought Skittles. George Zimmerman the human becomes George Zimmerman the White Hispanic (?), bigot and cold-blooded murderer.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">However, the truth (which some of us still care about) is rarely without nuance. First, it turns out that George Zimmerman was a mentor to black youths and, if his friends and defenders are to be believed, not a racist at all. Trayvon Martin, meanwhile, was suspended from school for drug paraphernalia possession, had recently assaulted a bus driver and apparently beat George Zimmerman severely before being shot (this last point is, of course, the most salient).</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The media, complicit in all of this, has only shown photographs of Trayvon Martin from 5 to 6 years ago – a young and innocent looking boy, while withholding more recent photographs where Trayvon looks a bit more streetwise. Meanwhile, the photographs of George Zimmerman are apparently from years ago and he has since lost 40 pounds. The effect of this is obvious – George Zimmerman is meant to look dangerous while Trayvon appears entirely non-threatening. The media wants these characters to stay true to its preferred storyline.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The point is not that George Zimmerman should or shouldn’t be arrested. The point is a narrative has been forced upon the public by the media, and by opportunists like Jackson and Sharpton, that may not reflect reality. Let the facts come out.</p> <p class="MsoNormal">2. The Broader Narrative.<br /></p><p class="MsoNormal">Assume for a moment that George Zimmerman is guilty of everything the media has assumed about him. In that case, I would still object to the broader narrative presented by the Trayvon Martin uproar – that white on black racism and crime is a major social issue. In 2012, that is simply not the case.</p><p class="MsoNormal">One would think, based on the media coverage, that white people shooting black people in hoodies is a national epidemic. It turns out that this is not the case. Unsurprisingly, the overwhelming majority of black murder victims are killed by other black people. Why no outrage there? Where are the marches? Where are the calls for change?</p> <p class="MsoNormal">The marches aren’t there because protesting black on black crime is not a comfortable or familiar narrative. In the United States, we are comfortable with certain storylines – in this case, the storyline that informs is black victimization at the hands of white oppressors. Of course, this narrative is an accurate representation of what went on in this country until the 1950s and 60s. Fueled largely by this historical baseline (as well as lingering guilt and fear of being called a racist), white people are hesitant to note that the treatment of black Americans has greatly improved over the last 50 years and that white on black racism is no longer a major social issue. Are there individual racists? Sure. No matter how civilized we become, we will never entirely eradicate humankind of all evil. However, individual instances of racism do not necessarily indicate that there exists a broader systemic problem. It boggles the mind that a society could exert such energy on this anomalous event while ignoring true systemic issues.</p><p class="MsoNormal">In conclusion, don’t rush to judgment…After all, a rush to judgment is exactly what you are accusing George Zimmerman of doing in the first place.</p>Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-24248210215421347302009-07-20T14:54:00.000-07:002009-07-24T19:01:34.800-07:00Politics Ombudsman: Sarah Palin<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7EEcc5uM_Ev5p71PYT7vJyk932T5A8Ic0M8-KJkOGtpvS8y0NHOaLzu1z3OaLPBa-9h1hM5cJNyxOfhBlu8y1piQF3mPRXv7CUO9hmMssG2tGsaeOoWp41yqQBxlz51jbHuRcKNz99iGk/s1600-h/Hvar-harbour-panorama-1.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7EEcc5uM_Ev5p71PYT7vJyk932T5A8Ic0M8-KJkOGtpvS8y0NHOaLzu1z3OaLPBa-9h1hM5cJNyxOfhBlu8y1piQF3mPRXv7CUO9hmMssG2tGsaeOoWp41yqQBxlz51jbHuRcKNz99iGk/s400/Hvar-harbour-panorama-1.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5362147029537414786" border="0" /></a><br /><br />Apologies for the time in between posts, TWO has been summering on his yacht in Hvar (pictured above), and life is slow. And sensual.<br /><br />But its time for a talk about politics.<br /><br />I am thinking of a American female politician. She comes from a working class family, was active in the local school system prior to beginning her political career and attained national notoriety at a young age. She is a polarizing figure, a lightening rod for criticism and is loved by some and hated by others... even those in her own party can't always agree as to whether she is helping or hurting her party's cause.<br /><br />I am speaking, of course, about rogue, lunatic politician <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cynthia_McKinney">Cynthia McKinney</a> (<a href="http://iusbvision.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/cynthia_mckinney.jpg">here</a> looking a bit like <a href="http://news.musiconplay.net/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/ol-dirty-bastard.jpg">ODB</a>).<br /><br />Moving on, Sarah Palin is "<a href="http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,533521,00.html">still very popular</a>" according to FoxNews. And this should be very troubling to the Republican Party.<br /><br />Palin, as a leader, has some positives in her makeup: she has a blue collar background, is religious, tough, self-made politically and is not a career politician in the traditional sense. She has met with success as a Governor and is a physically attractive person - in fact she is probably the only American politician to win a pageant since <a href="http://roissy.files.wordpress.com/2007/06/preview.jpg">Dennis Kucinich's</a> 1958 <a href="http://www.momlogic.com/images/sashay_son_pm-thumb-270x270.jpg">Boy's Beauty Pageant victory</a>.<br /><br />But the driving force behind Palin's popularity has little to do with her own substance, rather its the result of a reflexive movement by Republicans to support her in response to Democratic attacks. Palin, as a Vice Presidential candidate was quite clearly attacked and treated far differently than a similarly situated Democratic candidate would have been. The treatment of her and her family by the media, particularly when juxtaposed against that of President Obama's and VP Biden's, was truly shameful. The wagon circling began almost immediately and her popularity skyrocketed as a result. In short, Republicans were supporting Palin to show their distaste towards what they perceived to be unfair media treatment.<br /><br />And this can be very dangerous. While the vigor with which the liberal media attacked Palin's intelligence and experience may have been disproportionate and condescending, it doesn't mean that the liberal media was wrong. Frankly, an intelligent person doesn't answer a question <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9go38MgZ4w8">like this</a>. And a person with a working knowledge of national politics and economic theory doesn't <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L8__aXxXPVc">sound like this</a>. I actually cannot watch that clip - I get too uncomfortable, and TWO is rarely uncomfortable. Jack Cafferty is a liberal hack, but he is 100% correct when he says that "...that is one of the most pathetic pieces of tape I've ever seen for someone aspiring to one of the highest offices in this country." TWO has nothing personally against Sarah Palin (in fact she seems like a wonderful person), but no honest analysis can conclude that she is fit to be a high ranking politician on the national stage.<br /><br />A related but broader theme (and one equally troubling) is the anti-intellectual movement among mainstream Republicans. Conservatism has a long history of intellectualism - from David Hume to David Brooks. But recently there has been a backlash against "liberal elites" such that a Republican with an elite pedigree suddenly risks no longer being an authentic Republican. Not only is this an obvious recipe for disaster for the future, but, in fact, it has already hurt the Republican Party: A Romney ticket (TWO was hoping for Romney- <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kay_Bailey_Hutchison">Kay Bailey Hutchison</a>) easily beats Obama-Biden last November. But the Republican Party was scared by Romney's elite background and Mormon faith, so gave the country McCain-Palin -- and effectively Obama-Biden -- instead.<br /><br />A large base of the Republican Party views themselves as thoughtful, intelligent conservatives and has no interest in aligning themselves with garbled words and muddled thoughts. And that puts Palin, and her popularity, at the fault line of the Republican Party. If the Republican Party goes in the direction of Palins and Bushes (as opposed to Romneys and Giulianis), I see poor results and possibly huge fractures within the party.<br /><br />Palin has unfortunately become a 1 woman sideshow. She threatens the health of the party, and there is very little upside to her as a politician as she has demonstrated only a moderate understanding of national politics and an average intelligence. Palin's everywoman background and Republicans' resentment of Democratic attacks on her should not compensate for those huge deficiencies. Cynthia McKinney had blue collar roots and was attacked by Republicans, but Democrats weren't considering pushing her to the forefront of their party. Is Sarah Palin the Republican Cynthia McKinney? Not yet, but we are probably only a few crazy interviews and conspiracy theories away.<br /><br />In conclusion, sometimes the criticism is right.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-9482790180237101782009-06-23T09:39:00.000-07:002009-06-24T05:56:48.585-07:00Environmental Ombudsman: Climate ChangeHubris and Folly.<br /><br /><a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/06/22/AR2009062202836.html?hpid=sec-business">This Washington Post article</a> explains that the average consumer will pay $175 per year as a part of the new "climate bill," an act of legislation by the US Congress meant to combat global warming. Some believe that the costs per household could be as high as $4,300 per year. The problem? There are several, with the legislation and the climate change movement as a whole.<br /><br />This legislation, as described, only makes sense if you believe each of the following things:<br /><br />1) Global warming exists.<br />2) Global warming is caused by humans.<br />3) Global warming is bad.<br />4) Humans can take steps to reverse the effects of global warming.<br />5) The benefits of those steps outweigh the costs<br /><br />Lets look at each.<br /><br />1) There is a general consensus that global warming exists on a macro level. There was a <a href="http://earthobservatory.nasa.gov/Glossary/?mode=alpha&seg=l&segend=n">little ice age</a> believed to have ended around 1850, and a general warming over the last 150 years. However, two things bear mentioning. First, there has not been a global warming trend over the last 10 years. While still a warmer than average decade, there has actually been a <a href="http://www.wmo.ch/pages/prog/wcp/wcdmp/documents/WMO1031_EN_web.pdf">cooling trend since 1998</a>. Second, it was just 30 years ago when Lowell Ponte, backed by the vast majority of the scientific community wrote "It is a cold fact: the Global Cooling presents humankind with the most important social, political, and adaptive challenge we have had to deal with for ten thousand years. Your stake in the decisions we make concerning it is of ultimate importance; the survival of ourselves, our children, our species..."Fast forward to January of this year, and Al Gore, in front of Congress, averred that global warming "would bring a screeching halt to human civilization and threaten the fabric of life everywhere on the Earth" <span style="font-style: italic;">within this century</span>. The point? Analysis of weather trends, mapping global temperatures and the predicting of future climates is an undertaking still in its nascency. Everything should be taken with a grain of salt.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><em>“...the phenomena fall within the natural range of environmental change on our planet. [Nor is there] evidence that the climate during the 20th century departed discernibly from its historical pattern of constant change." </em></strong>- Marine Geologist Robert M. Carter of James Cook University in Australia.</span></span><br /><br />2) Lets assume that there is a global warming trend. Is it caused by humans? The UN's IPCC suggests that <a href="http://ipcc-wg1.ucar.edu/wg1/Report/AR4WG1_Print_SPM.pdf">man-made increases in greenhouse gas levels</a> are responsible for upwards of 90% of the temperature increases over the last 150 years. There are two logical barriers here.<br /><br />First, day 1 of logic class teaches you that correlation doesn't imply causation. The IPCC states that human carbon dioxide emissions are the primary cause of world temperature changes while failing to show that a change of a certain amount of carbon will result in a corresponding change in temperature, all else held constant. The IPCC's paper, linked above, takes the following logical progression: 1) it notes that man made carbon dioxide has increased by .01% (100 parts per 1 million) over the last 150 years, 2) lists observations of increased temperatures and then 3) states that humans are most likely responsible for most temperature changes. Of course, this skips over the most important step - How is it determined that a 100 part per million increase in carbon dioxide will increase temperatures? Answer - its not! No one knows whether that 100 part per million increase in carbon would raise temperatures by 1 degree or by 1 trillionth of one degree, and no one cares. The IPCC sees one thing increase, and another thing increase, and says, the first thing causes the second! Debate over. It remains unclear to TWO how the IPCC linked global warming to carbon dioxide and not, say, the popularity of <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gSuviM9uks">reggaeton music</a> or number of <a href="http://aolszewska.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/06/moja-nowa-czapka.jpg">west coast girls wearing Ed Hardy hats</a>, both of which have also experienced notable (and at times troubling) increases over the past few years.<br /><span id="ctl00_MainContent_lblBody"></span><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><em><strong>“The IPCC has actually become a closed circuit; it doesn’t listen to others. It doesn’t have open minds… I am really amazed that the Nobel Peace Prize has been given on scientifically incorrect conclusions by people who are not geologists,”</strong></em> - Indian geologist Dr. Arun D. Ahluwalia at Punjab University and a board member of the UN-supported International Year of the Planet.</span></span><br /><br />The second logical barrier is the failure to take into consideration outside forces. For the sake of argument, lets assume that human carbon dioxide increases have a measurable effect on temperature, all else held constant. Lets now take a deeper look. 95% of greenhouse gases are water vapor. Carbon dioxide accounts for about 4% of the greenhouse gases, and human contributions to carbon dioxide levels account for about 3% of that - <a href="http://www.geocraft.com/WVFossils/greenhouse_data.html">in other words, about 0.1% of greenhouse gas is carbon dioxide from humans</a>. Presumably, there could be variances and changes in the make up of the other 99.9% of the greenhouse gases that might have some effect on the atmosphere.<br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><em><br />Even doubling or tripling the amount of carbon dioxide will virtually have little impact, as water vapour and water condensed on particles as clouds dominate the worldwide scene and always will.”</em></strong> – . Geoffrey G. Duffy, a professor in the Department of Chemical and Materials Engineering of the University of Auckland, NZ.</span></span><br /><br />Lets forget about the atmosphere. There are other things to consider. Ocean currents like El Nino and El Nina cause temperature change -- explaining 2008's lower temperatures, according to the IPCC (this admission, on its own, would seem to support a more tempered position on the effect of humans on climate). Solar activity, totally ignored by the IPCC, is thought by many climatologists to be the single most important factor in temperature fluctuations. When one considers the fact <a href="http://news.nationalgeographic.com/news/2007/02/070228-mars-warming.html">that Mars' ice caps have been melting</a> and that there's presumably been no human carbon dioxide increases there, it would seem like a factor that reasonable people would at least include in the climate change discussion. However none of these other factors - atmospheric, land-based and solar - are given any credence by the IPCC.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><em><strong>“The models and forecasts of the UN IPCC "are incorrect because they only are based on mathematical models and presented results at scenarios that do not include, for example, solar activity.”</strong></em> - Victor Manuel Velasco Herrera, a researcher at the Institute of Geophysics of the National Autonomous University of Mexico</span></span><br /><br />3) Whats so bad about <a href="http://www.azlyrics.com/lyrics/postalservice/sleepingin.html">the world getting warmer</a>? A fascinating social aspect of the global warming crisis is the unspoken assumption that climate conditions are perfect <span style="font-style: italic;">only as they are right now</span>. Any variance up or down, we are told, will result in total catastrophe. TWO would propound that if human beings are effecting the climate, we are far better off slightly increasing temperatures (creating more water, more vegetation and more farmable land) then slightly decreasing temperatures (which would decrease water, vegetation and agriculture).<br /><br />4) Can humans take steps to reverse global warming? Assuming that you believe that 1) global warming exists, 2) its caused by humans and 3) its bad -- you still have to think that human beings can reverse it to even consider supporting this bill. The climate change bill <a href="http://in.reuters.com/article/environmentNews/idINTRE55L5FE20090622">looks to reduce carbon emissions</a> by 17% from 2005 levels over the next 10 years, by 42% by 2030 and by 83% by 2050. The problem? The IPCC says that even if carbon emissions were to be stabilized now, global warming would continue on for centuries (centuries!) because of lag times in our atmosphere's reaction. Now, TWO sees no reason to believe that the IPCC knows what its doing, but would assume that it would lean towards empowering and encouraging green legislation if possible.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><em>“Creating an ideology pegged to carbon dioxide is a dangerous nonsense...The present alarm on climate change is an instrument of social control, a pretext for major businesses and political battle. It became an ideology, which is concerning." </em></strong>- Environmental Scientist Professor Delgado Domingos of Portugal, the founder of the Numerical Weather Forecast group.<br /><br /></span></span>5) When one factors in the unintended, but likely, consequences of such legislation - including increased costs to ordinary citizens (estimates of $175 per year to consumers and as much as $4,300 to households in bills), onerous restrictions on businesses and a loss of American jobs - along with the nebulous state of climate change science, one wonders if the benefits (if any) of such a bill could possibly outweigh the costs.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><em>“The [global warming] scare mongering has its justification in the fact that it is something that generates funds." </em></strong>- Award-winning Paleontologist Dr. Eduardo Tonni of the Committee for Scientific Research in Buenos Aires and head of the Paleontology Department at the University of La Plata.</span></span><br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-size:100%;" ><span style="font-family:Times New Roman;"><span style="font-size:180%;"><span style="font-family:times new roman,times;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><em></em></strong></span></span></span></span></span>TWO has said it before, and he will say it again: TWO is an environmentalist. Corporations should internalize their costs on society, we should push safe emissions where possible, and we should take the steps necessary to protect our resources. We should move to smarter modes of transportation and shift away from foreign oil as much as practicable.<br /><br />What we should not accept is alarmism, rushed and hazy logic and unscientific thought. I have long privately believed that the global warming crisis resembled a large scale street hustle. If you've ever seen a street hustler sell, he brings together a crowd, waives some goods in front of their face, quickly explains what they are without any opportunity for discussion, and then has a couple of cronies in the audience, acting like ordinary pedestrians, who then rush up to frantically try to buy all of it. If done correctly, this sets off a frenzy, and everyone wants to buy.<br /><br />Applied here, green political leaders and organizations are trying to sell the public on the threat of global warming. Scientists, funded in many cases by green organizations, rush to support the position, reports are waived around and the public is stirred into a frenzy. Before anyone can question it, <a href="http://www.entertonement.com/clips/tksttlcnwg--The-debate-is-overAl-Gore-">the debate is over</a> and anyone who questions the position <a href="http://www.canadafreepress.com/2007/global-warming011807.htm">is quieted</a>.<br /><br /><span style="font-family:times new roman,times;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><em style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);"><strong>“Since I am no longer affiliated with any organization nor receiving any funding, I can speak quite frankly....As a scientist I remain skeptical." - </strong></em></span></span><span style="font-family:times new roman,times;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);">Atmospheric Scientist Dr. Joanne Simpson, formerly of NASA and who has been called "among the most preeminent scientists of the last 100 years."<br /></span></span></span><span style="font-family:times new roman,times;"><span style="font-size:100%;"><em style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);"><strong></strong></em></span></span><br />The reason why you don't declare that a debate is over or quiet skeptics is because discourse in our society is structured around the belief that an open and free market place for debate is the best way to <a href="http://epw.senate.gov/public/index.cfm?FuseAction=Minority.Blogs&ContentRecord_id=b35c36a3-802a-23ad-46ec-6880767e7966">judge the merits of different ideas</a>. Ironically, this bill is being proposed just as we are moving in on a tipping point in the global warming discussion. A record high of<a href="http://www.meteorologynews.com/2009/03/15/global-warming-skeptics-gaining-ground/"> 41%</a> of Americans believe that the global warming threat is exaggerated. Whereas 5 years ago no one would EVER have questioned global warming in a mainstream publication, highly regarded conservative columnists like <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/02/13/AR2009021302514.html">George Will</a> and <a href="http://article.nationalreview.com/?q=ZGI0MDdiZDQ3MGI1ZGYzNWZkZTcwZWM5YzI2MWI5N2U=">Charles Krauthammer</a> have recently expressed their skepticism and even liberal institutions like the <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2007/03/13/science/13gore.html?ex=1331438400&en=2df9d6e7a5aa6ed6&ei=5090&partner=rssuserland&emc=rss">New York Times</a> have tempered their support.<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><strong><em>“Many [scientists] are now searching for a way to back out quietly (from promoting warming fears), without having their professional careers ruined." </em></strong>- Atmospheric physicist James A. Peden, formerly of the Space Research and Coordination Center in Pittsburgh.<br /><br /></span></span>I can't predict whether this bill will pass, but I think that it is difficult to defend its passage based on the above. I can predict that at some point in the future, possibly within our lifetimes, civilization will look back on this "global warming crisis" as the pinnacle of human hubris and folly.<br /><br />In conclusion:<br /><br /><span style="color: rgb(0, 153, 0);font-family:times new roman,times;" ><span style="font-size:100%;"><em><strong>Warming fears are the “worst scientific scandal [in history]…When people come to know what the truth is, they will feel deceived by science and scientists.”</strong></em> - UN IPCC Japanese Scientist Dr. Kiminori Itoh, an award-winning PhD environmental physical chemist.</span></span><br /><br /><br /><span style=";font-family:";font-size:12;" ></span>Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-52998463740559829722009-06-03T13:36:00.000-07:002009-06-04T15:59:14.369-07:00Hackery Ombudsman: Paul Krugman<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmw8Fdb-zlnfioTP5tLHA5U7nmkloyPPgTguC1xKYzHGoBiRNCQOGO4XUMUJD5ikXxB6jg-VxDlRjKAewqT6AmkOmYMI9YguVqWo-V4qFW8R60SkF8y2zoIuYYGcymLRW0HzsPj4hIstGf/s1600-h/m3-santorini-photos.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjmw8Fdb-zlnfioTP5tLHA5U7nmkloyPPgTguC1xKYzHGoBiRNCQOGO4XUMUJD5ikXxB6jg-VxDlRjKAewqT6AmkOmYMI9YguVqWo-V4qFW8R60SkF8y2zoIuYYGcymLRW0HzsPj4hIstGf/s320/m3-santorini-photos.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5343605960707257298" border="0" /></a><br />There are many different kinds of hacks.<br /><br />But before we get into that - lets address my whereabouts recently. Some of you became a bit concerned with my absence, wondering where the column was, wondering what I was doing.<br /><br />To all of that I say shhh shhh shhhh. Everythings ok. Lets see if you can guess what I was doing. Was TWO<br /><br />A) Pausing before his next column, like a basketball player sinking a three pointer <a href="http://cache.daylife.com/imageserve/01YK2F7aPK6s4/340x.jpg">holding his arm aloft</a> as he runs down court, simply to impress upon the readers how incredibly correct he was about Lebron and the Cavs<br /><br />or<br /><br />B) Lounging at his estate in <a href="http://webpages.csus.edu/%7Escr52/santorini3.jpg">Santorini</a> (pictured above), sipping <a href="http://www.amarula.co.za/#/en/home/home/">marula fruit cream liqueur</a> and disburdening himself of musings on Bismark's Germany<br /><br />Trick question. BOTH! Because TWO is both always right and has a <a href="http://theworldsombudsman.blogspot.com/2009/03/many-of-you-may-have-come-across-this.html">Pan-European accent</a>.<br /><br />A brief moment on Lebron... in addition to the posturing and grimacing and limping around (which was on display almost constantly)... did you notice the Lebron-Headwhip? Here is a man who is 6-8, 275 pounds, who knocks <a href="http://www.nancarrow-webdesk.com/warehouse/storage2/2008-w18/img.211359_t.jpg">people around like bowling pins</a> when he flies through the lane. However, should he be caught in the face or upper chest with a flailing hand or an errant basketball, he <a href="http://www.truthaboutit.net/pictures/LeBron-James-Likes-To-Flop.jpg">whips his head backwards, rotates his arms in huge concentric circles</a> and usually rolls around on the ground for a while. Did Shaquille O'Neal do this during the hack-a-shaq days where he was hacked acrossed the shoulders, face and arms 20 times a game? No.<br /><br />Look, Lebron will be the best player in the NBA if he isn't already. He is young and has time to mature. In his defense, he has been told he is the greatest from the time he was 12 -- that sort of things leads to arrogance which may, in time, be tempered. TWO can admit that he would be just as bad if he had attained success at such a young age. As it is, I am older than Lebron and whenever my column has over 1000 hits in a day I <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W0MMNg2-lNs">spray champagne</a> out of the window onto unsuspecting pedestrians below. They hate that. But thats how I celebrate. Anyway, I continue to find it disheartening that the basketball commentators are typically too hacky to call out Lebron on his antics.<br /><br />Moving on to a different kind of hack, can we have a moment on Paul Krugman? Krugman might be the hackiest journalist to ever attain acclaim in American history. Krugman's most recent opus was <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/06/01/opinion/01krugman.html?_r=1">this</a> article, blaming Ronald Reagan (who is dead) for the 2008-2009 financial crisis. Am I oversimplifying? Is TWO using hyperbole? The title of the article is "Reagan Did It." Like its the last utterance of a victim at a murder scene.<br /><br />How did Reagan commit this crime 5 years after his death? Well, with the passing of the Garn-St. Germain Depository Institutions Act of course! This bill, passed 26 years before the 2008-2009 financial crisis, deregulated the savings and loan industry. One of the consequences was that it allowed lenders to lend more freely to potential home purchasers. Krugman's thesis is that this Act was the main cause of our current economic downturn.<br /><br />Before we just accept this argument and move on with our lives, TWO would like to examine facts. TWO loves facts. The Garn - St. Germain Act was a bi-partisan bill sponsored by Congressman Ferdinand St. Germain (D-RI) (who sounds like the sort of person who I would invite to my property in Santorini, but I digress) and Senator Jake Garn (R-Utah) (who sounds like the sort of person who would be re-caulking bathroom tiles at my property in Santorini, but I digress again). It passed the House and, with some amendments, the Senate overwhelmingly. Co-sponsors included current Democratic Senator Chuck Schumer and current Democratic Congressman Steny Hoyer. The Act allowed savings and loans to increase commercial lending to up to 10% of its assets, national banks to lend 15% of assets (up from 10%) and similar other slight increases. There's a savings and loan debacle a few years later, but essentially 10 years go by without any sort of substantial change in American home ownership and 25 years go by without any sort of housing related financial crisis.<br /><br />Fast forward to 1993. Home ownership is at 63%. At the urging of the Clinton administration, bank regulators reform the <a href="http://www.ffiec.gov/CRA/">Community Reinvestment Act</a> requiring banks to show they were lending to a set number of lower-income buyers. By 2000, home ownership has suddenly jumped to 68%. Meanwhile, GSEs like Fannie Mae are being pressured to provide more and more mortgages to high-credit-risk purchasers. How outrageous were the rates? In 1997 Fannie Mae was offering 97% loan to value mortgages. The Bush administration was no better. Attempting to rebound from the dot com bubble, Alan Greenspan advocated refinancing and borrowing against speculative home values and Bush <a href="http://www.nls.gov/news/speeches/presremarks.cfm">tirelessly pushed</a> for more home ownership for more low-income buyers. By 2001, Fannie Mae was actually offering 100% loan to value mortgages -- in other words, allowing people to buy homes without putting any money down! As pressure mounted to lend, the number of dangerous loans increased. During a three year period between 2003-2006, sub-prime and Alt-A loans jumped from making up about 1/10 of all mortgages to making up nearly 1/3. By 2008, US consumers were spending almost $1.1 trillion more than they were earning in spendable income.* When the values of homes fell, homeowners who had refinanced often had almost no equity value in their homes and often just didn't pay. Others couldn't afford their mortgages after the downturn. Financial institutions, many of whom held massive amounts of mortgage-backed-securities (Bear Stearns collapsed under a 35:1 leverage ratio) found that the underlying assets were greatly, greatly overvalued and illiquid. All the while, government officials (the Fed, the Clinton and Bush administrations and members of Congress) were asleep at the wheel, as <a href="http://theworldsombudsman.blogspot.com/2009/04/financial-crisis-ombudsman.html">we've discussed before</a>.<br /><br />To summarize, although there has been a general trend towards open markets and free lending over the past 30 years, the events proximately causing this financial crisis undeniably took place throughout the past 10 to 15 years. No serious thinker would call President Reagan, of all people, "the prime villain" of this financial crisis.<br /><br />And that is really the point. Paul Krugman is capable of being a serious thinker, but he chooses not to be. He instead chooses to be a hack. A economics professor, skilled writer and (somehow) Nobel Prize winner, he has relegated himself to the journalistic equivalent of a drunk heckler at a basketball game, yelling inflammatory things to anyone who will listen. As people tune him out or change seats, he has to yell louder and more obscenely to get noticed. By the end of his career Krugman will be writing articles like "George Bush - Sarah Palin Love Child Is <a href="http://www.thehumanmarvels.com/uploaded_images/jojo-713518.jpg">Wolf Boy</a>" for the <a href="http://www.nationalenquirer.com/">National Enquirer</a>.<br /><br />Politically, there are two types of people: People who treat their political party like its their favorite college football team and people who just want the government to get things right. The former will trace back the roots of any problem to a misstep by their rival and make any argument, no matter how convoluted, to show that their "team" is blameless. The latter would prefer that elected officials who get things right be given proper credit, and those who get things wrong be held accountable, no matter the letter after their name.<br /><br />In conclusion, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k04sVhgfkOs">don't be a hack</a>.<br /><br /><br />*We don't really cite sources in any organized way here at TWO, but, for those interested, I relied heavily on financial figures from <a href="http://spectator.org/archives/2009/02/06/the-true-origins-of-this-finan">this article</a> by Peter J. Wallison and <a href="http://www.fpafunds.com/news_05292009_outrage.asp">this speech</a> by Robert RodriguezJonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-17559505308689274802009-05-19T10:43:00.000-07:002009-05-19T14:27:53.684-07:00Bama Ombudsman: The Cleveland Cavaliers<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd8Si9gzTw_oA24gmd_Is-Yu8lrkXwbAtVQEjUQUINze7H8bFvhQAqlNvoKt2W_K0lnU_VU6HzaX882mgDRMvLr-X3RDD35JDsE3zK3VAzdDWQfJUQW-nGKR4XpP1_htfX2Mgfut8Ez-ws/s1600-h/lebron_james_nba_090310_cle-at-lac-05.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 266px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhd8Si9gzTw_oA24gmd_Is-Yu8lrkXwbAtVQEjUQUINze7H8bFvhQAqlNvoKt2W_K0lnU_VU6HzaX882mgDRMvLr-X3RDD35JDsE3zK3VAzdDWQfJUQW-nGKR4XpP1_htfX2Mgfut8Ez-ws/s400/lebron_james_nba_090310_cle-at-lac-05.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5337647027634773938" border="0" /></a><br />Bamafied.<br /><br />The noun <a href="http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Bama">bama</a> is a common term in Washington DC. Like all colloquial terms it lacks a set definition, but basically defines someone who is garish, posturing and egomaniacal to a clownish degree while at the same time essentially insincere and likely insecure. A list of bamas or bamafied behavior might be helpful, but in the interest of time, TWO will just point out that about 90% of celebrities are bamas. About 75% of people living in Los Angeles are bamas, as TWO estimates that three quarters of the population of LA are OPALC (Ordinary People Acting Like Celebrities). 100% of <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qooht8YtXYk">white people</a> <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgttuFQqf0w">speaking</a> in a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WG_m6h-XvMo">blaccent</a> are <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CgVsbhue-g">bamas</a>. <a href="http://www.schoollibraryjournal.com/articles/blog/1790000379/20090116/luke-perry-20070325-230933.jpg">Dylan McKay</a> was a bama.<br /><br />Which brings us to the Cleveland Cavaliers. The most bamafied sports team of all time.<br /><br />1) Lebron James.<br /><br />a) Easily the King Bama. He is essentially a cross between <a href="http://a0.vox.com/6a00f30f56ab0900010100a7ed9eb8000e-500pi">Brian Bosworth</a> and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RIAVegnlNjc">early 90s Shaquille O'Neal</a> with just a sprinkle of <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EI2afDGo8m8">Chuck Bass</a>. The pregame ritual where he sprays <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6-DIk5-PrY">powder over his head</a> like hes some sort of wizard <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zMO2khJfwGs">(or a genius)</a> is arrogant, ridiculous and a slap in the face to the other players on the court. Yet it has been <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9SiQKxja79M">celebrated</a> as some incredible pop-culture event. He <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T4Nz3LRu33g">poses</a> and postures after nearly every big shot and dunk. After hitting that half-court shot in the playoffs, he said his range was "limitless."<br /><br />Also from Lebron's mouth? The following quotes:<br /><br />- "Ask me to play. I'll play. Ask me to shoot. I'll shoot. Ask me to pass. I'll pass. Ask me to steal, block out, sacrifice, lead, dominate. Anything. But it's not what you ask of me. It's what I ask of myself."<br /><br />- "I’m like a superhero. Call me Basketball Man."<br /><br />- "Jesus Christ needed 12 disciples, but I only have 5 teammates who really get minutes."<br /><br />Just kidding about the last one. But still, has an athlete ever guzzled their own kool-aid to this extent?<br /><br />And the media (fueled by the NBA's marketing department) loves it! You will never hear anything bad about Lebron James in the mainstream media. But ask someone from Cleveland who has had, or knows someone who's had, any interaction with Lebron James and ask them how he's acted. You might be surprised.<br /><br />b) Fake Injuries. There is a recent trend in the NBA that I've noticed this season, and that is the fake injury. For some reason, in a sport otherwise known for its <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qM8SvUr53Jk">hip-hop</a> machismo and emphasis on <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnaoVV46hk4">street cred</a>, it has become cool to grimace and hobble around like an old man whenever mild contact takes place. Whether its to show how tough you are or to get attention (or both), it happens constantly. Here are a few notable examples:<br /><br />- In March, Lebron James bumps into a a 47 year old, 150 pound referee and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DznBd9wWptI">rolls around on the floor</a> like he is semi-conscious. The referee gets up immediately.<br /><br />- In the first round of the playoffs, Rajon Rondo is carried from the court and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSgUesVqUdQ">then acts with surprise</a> when a reporter asks if he's ok. Hes totally fine! Why would you even ask that question?<br /><br />- The best, of course, is Paul Pierce. A few months ago, Paul Pierce was carried off the court in a heap and then rolled into the lockerroom on a wheelchair. A wheelchair! I'm surprised there weren't visible signs of slobber dripping from his mouth. Anyway, he returned, showing no ill-effects, LATER IN THE SAME GAME! <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ysT8RA6JQks">Amazing</a>.<br /><br />Watch for Lebron's fake grimace throughout the rest of the playoffs.<br /><br />2) The Cavaliers. There have been <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qLkHr61Z2M">team-wide celebrations</a> and <a href="http://i.a.cnn.net/si/multimedia/photo_gallery/0603/gallery.nfltdcelebration/images/05152422.jpg">groups of players</a> with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ev6AAgZGaPs">choreographed routines</a> for years. But never has a team had so many <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E5p5zVl8Y-k">idiotic</a>, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VrxJR_BjnLo">choregraphed routines</a> going on at once, every single game. While not roundly applauded, it again has received a reasonably <a href="http://www.cavfanatic.com/ryz/blog/2009/03/18/cavs_pregame_ritual">warm reception</a> as just a bunch of zany guys having <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ekA5-lBH-0">fun</a>. Wrong-Side-Of-Every-Argument-Bill Simmons' shared his <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/090513/part3">sentiment</a> that watching Lebron & the Cavaliers is "like watching a more animated/funny/bombastic version of Duncan's Spurs.....I really get a kick out of them."<br /><br />Now why is this a problem? TWO certainly isn't losing sleep over what dances other people like to do. But a couple of things are troubling. First, the behavior is disrespectful to the opponents and makes a mockery of the sport. This is an event watched by millions and your opponents are professional athletes...and you are posing for fake pictures and saluting your teammates before the game? Second, the quasi-acceptance of this foolishness sends a message to kids that this sort of behavior is okay. We'll see how hilarious and bombastic it is when before every Little League game players engage in elaborate miming routines involving somersaults, fist pounds and butterfly kisses. "Why is Billy rubbing pinetar all over himself?" "Shhhh pregame ritual."<br /><br />A drunk who mouths off too much needs only to get punched in the teeth once before he changes his ways. The best thing for all of us is that the Cavs get beaten down by either the Magic or (more likely) the Lakers in the next two rounds. Lets do it for the children.<br /><br />In conclusion, TWO has nothing against butterfly kisses.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-54052513696297043022009-05-11T12:30:00.000-07:002009-05-11T15:36:42.993-07:00Common Sense Ombudsman: Vaccines for a Real EpidemicSometimes, there is hysteria.<br /><br />There has been <a href="http://www.bloomberg.com/apps/news?pid=20601124&sid=aLfBou.TH4lI&refer=home">chaos</a> and gnashing of teeth over the past few weeks over swine flu. <a href="http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2009/05/090511151620.htm">Its a pandemic</a>!!!!!! Well, maybe not...<a href="http://in.reuters.com/article/worldNews/idINIndia-39555720090511">but its going to be!</a> There have been HUNDREDS killed in Mexico... or <a href="http://www.abc.net.au/news/stories/2009/05/02/2559039.htm?WT.mc_id=newsmail">maybe just 16</a>.<br /><br />Putting aside the media's interest in stirring the public into a frenzy (could this be just like <a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0802821/">Pandemic</a> or <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZUw2zNR5Dzc">Quarantine</a> - or - even better - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4B7FW8b5qI">I Am Legend</a>?!) ...what are the facts?<br /><br />There have been <a href="http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5hZVkRqV2uZVim0TRk5R1ZBfovTCAD9846SHO0">61 deaths worldwide, including 3 in the United States</a>. There have been only 40 confirmed swine flu cases in the US, more than half occurring in one New York school. <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/28/opinion/28tue1.html">Only 4 other states</a> have had a single person test positive for swine flu. For a country with 300 million people, those figures aren't too bad. And they certainly don't seem to warrant the <a href="http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kimberly-brooks/curb-the-swine-flu-lose-t_b_195417.html">panicked</a> coverage given by our media. When you consider that the normal influenza killed <a href="http://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/mm5725a5.htm">83 children</a> in 2008, the hysteria is even more puzzling.<br /><br />But what if I told you that every year, around 40,000 otherwise healthy Americans are killed from one particular cause? Before I could even finish the sentence, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BIqL99_NBlU">Sanjay Gupta</a> would reflexively gear up his hazmat suit, pack a few <a href="http://phc-online.com/v/vspfiles/photos/Ensure-Plus-24x8oz-2T.jpg">Ensures</a> and prepare himself for 18 hour shifts on CNN. Fox News would create a special music intro with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vI4Gbz-s1w">drums and electric guitars</a> for reports on the topic.<br /><br />Can you imagine their disappointment when I tell them that the cause was traffic accidents?<br /><br />Over the past few years, deaths have ranged from the <a href="http://www.nhtsa.dot.gov/portal/site/nhtsa/template.MAXIMIZE/menuitem.f2217bee37fb302f6d7c121046108a0c/?javax.portlet.tpst=1e51531b2220b0f8ea14201046108a0c_ws_MX&javax.portlet.prp_1e51531b2220b0f8ea14201046108a0c_viewID=detail_view&itemID=d3a1275827063010VgnVCM1000002c567798RCRD&pressReleaseYearSelect=2005">low 40,000s</a> to a near-record low of <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2009/TRAVEL/04/06/us.traffic.deaths/">37,000</a> in 2008. But no one really cares. Why?<br /><br />First, its old news. Traffic accidents might go slightly up, or might go slightly down - but no one is going to make a horror movie out of traffic accidents (although <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gyj52n1lOuA">Duel</a> was a great old school film) and the media knows its not going to be able to frighten the bejesus out of the masses with the reports. If it won't increase ratings, then why report on it?<br /><br />Second - and this is related to the first - people, rationally or irrationally, internalize certain dangers, treating them as a fixed cost of living. We like driving, we like living in the suburbs, we like getting places fast, trucks deliver things to us - its a shame that people also die, but overall the benefits outweigh the costs. Over time, people just begin accepting the fact that there are going to be a lot of deaths from traffic accidents and stop asking why.<br /><br />Not TWO.<br /><br />When one considers that a <a href="http://www.washingtontimes.com/news/2009/jan/23/pro-life-activists-march-on-court/">quarter of a million people</a> marched on Washington to oppose abortion, that <a href="http://www.nodeathpenalty.org/newab016/garyGraham.html">2,000 people protested the execution</a> of a convicted killer in Texas, that New York spends <a href="http://www.health.state.ny.us/press/releases/2001/cdcsmoke.htm">roughly $50 million</a> per year to <a href="http://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/75010.php">prevent disease and premature death</a> due to cigarette smoking, that the entire nation - including both houses of Congress and the Supreme Court - fiercely debated the life or death of <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2005/LAW/03/31/schiavo/">a single woman</a>, the only inference is that our culture places a high degree of value on life and its protection.<br /><br />From afar, then, it must look quite odd that we allow nearly anyone to drive 3,000 pound vehicles at high rates of speed in opposite directions, separated by just a few feet and a painted line.<br /><br />Some simple steps, in addition to wearing a seat belt, to reduce the likelihood of accident deaths:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) Substantial dividers or spacial separation on highways</span>. Crashes at high speeds are always dangerous, but head on collisions are far more deadly. There is no reason why any road should be built where cars travel over 50 mph in opposite directions with just a double yellow line separating them.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2) Stricter driving tests for teenagers</span>. Driving should not be considered a right of passage. Lack of coordination or <a href="http://blog.instantcast.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/11/britney-spears-baby-lap02.jpg">lack of maturity</a> are great reasons to keep kids off of the road unless they are with a parent or a driving instructor.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3) Stricter rules for kids under 21</span>. Inexperienced drivers cause a <a href="http://www.cdc.gov/MotorVehicleSafety/Teen_Drivers/teendrivers_factsheet.html">disproportionate amount of damage</a>. As such, laws should be geared to address this segment of the population. At the risk of sounding over the top, I think that governors on engines, restrictions on driving with friends and at night, and limitations on highway driving are all reasonable steps to take. If a driver under 21 goes a period of time without incident, then some of these rules can be eased. Immaturity and distraction can be <a href="http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/story?id=3379012">deadly</a>.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">4) Stricter rules for people over 70</span>. As people lose their motor skills/concentration, they become a liability on the road. Requiring a test every 5 years or after any driving related incident would help weed out potentially <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2003/US/West/07/17/farmers.market.crash/index.html">dangerous drivers</a>.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">5) Revoke people's licenses for egregious behavior</span>. For some reason, we are willing to sentence babbling <a href="http://www.famm.org/ProfilesofInjustice/FederalProfiles/BarbaraScrivner.aspx">meth-heads</a> and <a href="http://www.famm.org/ProfilesofInjustice/FederalProfiles/StephanieNodd.aspx">cocaine peddlers</a> to 30 years, but allow drunks to get <a href="http://www.dui.com/dui-library/virginia/news/23rd-drunk-driving">DUI after DUI</a> with mere <a href="http://findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qn4188/is_20060820/ai_n16672943/">slaps on the wrist</a>. Why should <a href="http://www.wlwt.com/news/13229305/detail.html">this</a> ever happen? Look, minor traffic accidents and speeding tickets are understandable. But people should only be allowed to endanger other peoples' lives a couple of times before they get moved to the passenger's seat.<br /><br />In conclusion, "<a href="http://www.dot.gov/affairs/nhtsa0905.htm">We are in the midst of a national epidemic....if this many people were to die from any one disease in a single year, Americans would demand a vaccine.</a>"Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-2543364843703942852009-05-06T20:12:00.000-07:002009-05-06T20:34:38.744-07:00Midweek Ombudsman: Some Admin<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdYpR4JCV4NggE813d_2DzXO-nOuSCK2bujcVpTMtKsL-IH8JLtOhur_6YIhTaEIs2jjj7aHmAqtXS2xCLeFeXStFL2v3i_y2t-jYeOJVOTgsG9Jnj_Cr4_UHM8eERxsdmSOfklSg_pK9g/s1600-h/Mcdowelloddibe.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 163px; height: 229px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhdYpR4JCV4NggE813d_2DzXO-nOuSCK2bujcVpTMtKsL-IH8JLtOhur_6YIhTaEIs2jjj7aHmAqtXS2xCLeFeXStFL2v3i_y2t-jYeOJVOTgsG9Jnj_Cr4_UHM8eERxsdmSOfklSg_pK9g/s400/Mcdowelloddibe.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5332917748373488354" border="0" /></a><br />Midweek update, mostly to push WHTNEP and my own facebook popularity:<br /><br />1) TWO's friend <a href="http://hatethepatriots.blogspot.com/">WHTNEP</a> wants you to help <a href="http://www.aolcdn.com/aolr/jessica-alba-date-400a020107.jpg">Jessica Alba</a>. See <a href="http://hatethepatriots.blogspot.com/2009/05/jessica-alba-needs-your-help.html">this</a>. We're not sure of the reason, but we think that WHTNEP briefly dated Jessica Alba in middle school. The relationship was ruined by an unfortunate incident at a school dance involving golf cleats, Vicks vapo-rub and two packs of Baja California Fruit Starbursts. Don't ask him about it.<br /><br />2) Become TWO's facebook friend. Search World's Ombudsman and add! I have an esteemed, elite and somewhat sensual group of friends. About half speak English, and an oddly large portion are from Indonesia. Fact.<br /><br />In conclusion, TWO honors Oddibe McDowell once a year by driving to his birthplace, Hollywood, Florida, and throwing baseball cards into the ocean.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-24427162686590133072009-05-05T14:48:00.000-07:002009-05-05T16:07:20.980-07:00Prediction Ombudsman: Coming Clean<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPGEuphRoN5lyM2TvQnH3pirml89ytAQ8Iw3s5oBmpaOWaNQzrX4rwV9cSALTXav-EuwIpBniEqGY3Vc4uHqMCTUjG7vB0BesVoDrRmx_cjDWNoN7RDEshYhzPaCWDNxa1_oBecO8yH7OW/s1600-h/46682471.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 215px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPGEuphRoN5lyM2TvQnH3pirml89ytAQ8Iw3s5oBmpaOWaNQzrX4rwV9cSALTXav-EuwIpBniEqGY3Vc4uHqMCTUjG7vB0BesVoDrRmx_cjDWNoN7RDEshYhzPaCWDNxa1_oBecO8yH7OW/s320/46682471.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5332476253555716850" border="0" /></a><br />Making bold predictions is risky.<br /><br />Last week I predicted "Hatton in an upset win over Pacquaio." One time, ESPN's fantasy football guru, Matthew Berry, told the world to bench <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qeeF6pJ6l0I">Adrian Peterson</a> against the Chargers because of the Chargers' stiff rushing defense. Peterson went on to rush for an NFL record <a href="http://www.nfl.com/gamecenter/boxscore?game_id=29315&displayPage=tab_box_score&season=2007">296 yards and 3 touchdowns</a>. Aside from that, my Hatton prediction may have been the worst prediction ever. Rarely has a fight between two great fighters been so utterly lopsided. Pacquaio-Hatton was a 140 lb version of <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I-bv6DO73dQ">Tyson -Spinks</a>.<br /><br />A couple of thoughts. First, TWO was actually in Las Vegas for the fight. Was TWO at the glitzy <a href="http://www.destination360.com/north-america/us/nevada/las-vegas/images/s/mgm-grand-las-vegas.jpg">MGM Grand</a> watching in person? Absolutely not. TWO was at <a href="http://www.destination360.com/north-america/us/nevada/las-vegas/images/s/treasure-island-las-vegas.jpg">Treasure Island's</a> somewhat bushleague theater watching on closed circuit with 1,000 screaming, <a href="http://a.espncdn.com/photo/2008/0624/box_g_pacquiano_580.jpg">flag-waving Philipinos</a>. Thats how I roll. TWO is a man of the people. Anyway, the night before the fight, while sauntering through the <a href="http://weblogs.newsday.com/sports/watchdog/blog/Bellagio-300-02.jpg">Bellagio</a>, TWO met and spoke with <a href="http://www.questmedia.net/images/BertSugar.bmp">Bert Sugar</a>, arguably <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bert_Sugar">the world's most famous boxing columnist</a>. Interestingly, Bert Sugar held the same opinion as TWO that the betting odds against Hatton (paying about +220, Pacquaio was -300) were off, that the fight would be much closer than most anticipated and that Hatton was a much better bet based on the odds. While that shows that TWO has his finger on the pulse of the boxing intelligentsia, it does little to mitigate the overall <a href="http://news.sky.com/sky-news/content/StaticFile/jpg/2009/May/Week1/15274055.jpg">result of the fight</a>. In addition to being a man of great physical strength, TWO is also a man of great integrity, and will admit that he was wrong.<br /><br />Second, never has the result of a sporting event stirred such sympathy in TWO for a losing party than this fight. Perhaps it is because Hatton is such a great champion, or because he is such a likeable figure, or perhaps it is because of the fan loyalty and the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0eHSsIFrVM">party atmosphere</a> that had heretofore followed him through 45 wins and just one loss (to the <a href="http://www.newsli.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/02/floyd-mayweather.gif">world's best fighter at the time</a>)... but the way he was beaten was so thorough, so quick and so complete that I felt quite sad for him. Being punished and eventually knocked unconscious for five minutes in front of your fiance, parents, thousands of devoted fans and millions of viewers had to be totally humiliating for someone of Hatton's pride. To be clear, TWO is not saying that Hatton SHOULD feel humiliated (losing to two fighters both considered the pound for pound best in the world at the time is nothing to be ashamed of), but you know that Hatton is beside himself over the result of the fight.<br /><br />In conclusion, TWO is a risk taker.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-37982385428696578362009-04-28T11:21:00.000-07:002009-04-28T14:03:31.732-07:00Weekend Ombudsman: NFL Draft and BoxingBoxing and football.<br /><br />Two weekend reflections:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) The Redskins' Draft.</span> Most people, including TWO, were pleased with the Redskins draft. That does not mean that it was a good draft, it just means that <a href="http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2007/08/16-22/savage_fred-wonder-years.jpg">Dan Snyder's</a> plans to ruin the franchise were thwarted and we literally were forced into making a good decision (<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fGUc3UL64f0">Brian Orakpo</a>) with our first round pick. Vinny Cerrato's inability to correctly pronounce Orakpo (he kept saying Orapko) at the post-draft press conference at first seems like a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PDnsSoEGBzs">funny</a>/<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hORaebYWDwk">harmless </a>slip up until you consider the fact that this man is charged with vigorously and thoroughly researching the minutia of all potential players that could be drafted and thus determine the franchise's future. And Vinny doesn't know the last name of our first round pick?<br /><br />If that isn't evidence enough of our scant research, consider that the Redskins also selected a LB, <a href="http://pictopia.com/perl/get_image?provider_id=410&size=550x550_mb&ptp_photo_id=672991">Cody Glenn</a>, who had pedestrian stats and was injured/suspended for most of his senior season. When questioned about the reason for the suspension - <a href="http://www.nebraska.tv/Global/story.asp?S=10264698">he lied</a>. Hey - he's an average athlete and injury prone, but at least he's dishonest! In the 7th round, we picked a wide receiver described as having "<a href="http://www.cbssports.com/nfl/draft/players/1130614">failed to impress the NFL scouts</a>." Guess which scouts were apparently totally impressed? Vinny & co.<br /><br />Hail.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2. </span><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://img.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2007/10_03/CarlFrochGETTY_468x635.jpg">Carl Froch</a><span style="font-weight: bold;"> - </span><a style="font-weight: bold;" href="http://www.hbo.com/boxing/img/events/2007/0519_taylor_spinks/482x316/weighin/weighin_01_482x316.jpg">Jermaine Taylor</a>. Arguably one of the best fights of the year came and went with very little fanfare because of the NFL draft and NBA & NHL playoff series. Taylor dominated the early part of the fight, knocking down the undefeated Froch for the first time in his career, but Froch came back and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CKzBXf3j_8g">scored a TKO with 14 seconds left in the 12th and final round to win</a>. Taylor was ahead on all cards and would have won the fight otherwise. A couple of things. First, people compared the stoppage of the fight to a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1v3mz__qUE">fight 19 years ago involving a different Taylor</a>. The <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chavez_versus_Taylor">famous 1990 Meldrick Taylor - Julio Cesar Chavez</a> fight probably shouldn't have been stopped. However, the Froch-Taylor fight was different. TWO, who was rooting for Jermaine Taylor, believes that the fight was correctly stopped as Taylor literally could not defend himself at all -- a defenseless fighter can sustain serious damage in just a few seconds, let alone 14.<br /><br />Second, Jermaine Taylor is one of those guys who is frustrating to root for. He is similar to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LUs1Kyo7i2E">Zab Judah</a>, in that he is faster and more talented than almost all of his opponents. Both Judah and Taylor do not have the requisite stamina to do well against top competition in fights that go past 7 rounds. Judah also has serious lapses in concentration and some behavioral issues, which adds to his problems. Taylor, meanwhile, is incredibly likeable which makes it all the more difficult to stomach what appears to be a lack of adequate preparation. If you look at Taylor's losses, he was faster than and should have knocked out Kelly Pavlik in Taylor-Pavlik I and lost a close fight in Taylor-Pavlik II. Taylor was clearly the faster and more powerful boxer through the first half of the Froch fight. Had he not completely collapsed in the 12th round - literally, anything short of a knockout or stoppage - he wins the fight. Zab Judah, meanwhile, has been outclassed by two fighters - Floyd Mayweather and Miguel Cotto (the latter just barely). His four other losses, in TWO's opinion, have been due to failure to adequately prepare or lapses in concentration. Even the Kostya Tszyu fight <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4M1Y-sQidIU">generally favored Zab</a>, until he took 4 seconds off at the end of the 2nd round, got punched in the mouth and then <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2o7A3rMN6Co">staggered around jabbering to the referree like a drunk businessman hitting on a flight attendant on a turbulent plane</a>.<br /><br />What a simile!<br /><br />In conclusion, Hatton in an upset over Pacquiao this weekend.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-32071701352555095492009-04-24T13:02:00.000-07:002009-04-24T15:00:49.678-07:00NFL Draft Ombudsman: Matt Franchez & Mel Kiper<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjtK-GDqFpwuEgsg4NmP8RRPm5L5b2e6S1ebbfPxyWH84D4C3FOKblKdGYO04JQ2wokFkjztCTWkoKaanWGMBghang_ILYGPxxiN31mFhgFyzrXGlAeT3U4a7NJDCwHRhSbnGgF7cgZSkm/s1600-h/101.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 195px; height: 262px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgjtK-GDqFpwuEgsg4NmP8RRPm5L5b2e6S1ebbfPxyWH84D4C3FOKblKdGYO04JQ2wokFkjztCTWkoKaanWGMBghang_ILYGPxxiN31mFhgFyzrXGlAeT3U4a7NJDCwHRhSbnGgF7cgZSkm/s320/101.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5328376975780767330" border="0" /></a><br />Every day is an opportunity to make bad decisions.<br /><br />And <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/04/23/AR2009042303065.html">that</a> is what its like being a Washington Redskins fan these days. TWO will reflect on the sad state of his favorite team and a quick Mel Kiper musing in his draft preview.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) The Redskins.</span> It is hard enough to win in this league as it is - you have to deal with injuries, coaching and players moving around - and even the best, most efficiently run teams play close games and lose and sometimes even miss the playoffs. But what if you had an owner who took active steps to worsen your favorite team? Welcome to my world. Being a Redskins fan is like watching a horror movie in a theater where the main character is clearly making a terrible decision that will lead to her bloody death but there is nothing you can do to stop her. Even when the obligatory fat black lady sitting near you says loudly "B*tch you better get out that house!" there is no effect...the script has already been written.<br /><br />And in the Matt "Franchez" Sanchez sweepstakes, <a href="http://www.celebritynooz.com/images2/fred_savage_then.jpg">Danny Snyder</a> is that main character clearly making a terrible decision, and all of us are the fat black woman yelling. Again, to be clear, all of us are fat black women. Anyway, the Redskins have at least a serviceable quarterback in Jason Campbell. What they don't have is a starting DE, an OLB, or an OT. When I say we don't have an outside linebacker, I literally mean that the Redskins might start the season off with a <a href="http://www.dumberthanmycat.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/03/cerratoeye.jpg">wild-eyed and disoriented Vinny Cerrato</a> as a linebacker on our 53 man roster. There are also needs at center and several backup positions.<br /><br />And yet, with all of our needs, Snyder is looking to do something that will further shake up a team that for the last 4 years has not had a chance to play under the same offensive system. And this goes beyond continuity - this could be a devastatingly bad pick: there is <a href="http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/images/2008/05/07/schuler.jpg">no guarantee</a> that quarterbacks selected towards the top of the draft <a href="http://taylormadetirade.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/ryanleaf1.jpg">will be good</a>. This is basic stuff, and Redskins fans are left wondering - is Snyder stupid - does he really think that you can just move pieces around interchangeably like a video game? Does he just like attention? Shouldn't someone who was so successful in their other business ventures have learned something about football over the past 10 years?<br /><br />There is also a total lack of accountability. Last season, the Redskins traded a 2009 2nd round pick for Jason Taylor, who played about 10 games and then was released. This is not a small deal - essentially, we could have had the 40th best player in college football as a part of our team for a number of years, and instead, now, we have no player. That was the effect of that move. <a href="http://voices.washingtonpost.com/redskinsinsider/2009-nfl-draft/snyder-cerrato-zorn-meet-the-p.html?wprss=redskinsinsider">Here</a> is Vinny Cerrato's quote when questioned a couple of days ago: "It is what it is. We made a trade last year with our second-round pick. We wish Jason [Taylor] would have stayed healthy, but it is what it is."<br /><br />"It is what it is" is a tell-tale sign of being a fool. That is the equivalent of using the defined word in its definition: Q: whats a fool? A: Well, its basically someone who acts like a fool. Q: Vinny - what about trading a 2nd round pick for a guy who played 10 games? Vinny: Well, it is what it is...meaning that its a situation where we traded a 2nd round pick for a guy who played 10 games. "It is what it is" is the sibling of "Thats just Manny being Manny" and is the cousin of "He's just doing his thing" and "He just does what he does." TWO suggests any athlete or commentator using any of these phrases be banned from giving their opinions for one year.<br /><br />Anyway, expect the Redskins to do whatever they can to mess up their own draft. The same duo that picked 2 wide receivers and a TE in 3 2nd round picks last year (when we had almost no defensive linemen) is totally capable of <a href="http://www.profootballtalk.com/2009/04/22/an-interesting-theory-on-the-rams-supposed-interest-in-sanchez/">being toyed with</a> and trading Clinton Portis, all of our first round picks until 2015 and FedEx Field for Matt Sanchez. The Redskins will be playing home games on the Montgomery Mall parking lot in Rockville, Maryland.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2) Mel Kiper.</span> A couple of things to watch from Mel Kiper on draft day:<br /><br />First, <a href="http://thesportshernia.typepad.com/blog/images/2007/04/29/mel_kiper_raging_hair_helmet.jpg">Mel</a>, a man who would be selling elixers out of a covered wagon if this were the 19th century, will claim that he "had him going about there" no matter who is taken in what place. Mel releases so many mock drafts - most of them drastically conflicting, that at some point every player is in nearly every draft slot. <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=easterbrook/060502">Gregg Easterbrook's review</a> from a couple years back (under the "Mel Kiper Watch" heading) sums Mel up perfectly.<br /><br />Second, and this is related to the first, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qyBSRYAQ2DY">Mel hates Todd McShay</a>. Watch for palpable anger, and possibly a fistfight, when the two of them spar. Before Todd McShay, Kiper was the only draft guru. He was free to shoot from the hip, because frankly no one (other than Easterbrook that one time) bothered to fact check or keep all of his mock drafts straight. But now, McShay is in there keeping him in line. And Mel hates it. For example, yesterday on Sports Center, Mel Kiper incredibly choose <a href="http://images.morris.com/images/cjonline/mdControlled/cms/2008/04/13/268019850.jpg">Josh Freeman</a> as both his most likely draft bust AND his most likely draft boom! In years past, no one would have said anything, but McShay called him out and asked him to explain. Mel got flustered, mumbled something about upside and then tried to sell Hannah Storm a magic potion to cure her ailments before they cut to commercial.<br /><br />In conclusion, at least I have <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TlKvo9gVQg4">this</a>.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-16792433991081774542009-04-20T13:07:00.000-07:002009-04-21T08:46:06.898-07:00Common Sense Ombudsman: Guns<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T5Xl0Qry-hA">Bang bang.</a><br /><br />10 years have past since Columbine, and the effect of that day on our culture is still debated. <a href="http://www.theeagle.com/nation/Killings-rile-gun-control-advocates">Certain corners</a> of the media are <a href="http://www.time.com/time/nation/article/0,8599,1891416,00.html?iid=tsmodule">wondering aloud</a> today why support for gun control "petered out" in the decade since the massacre. Meanwhile, <a href="http://www.nra.org/">other groups</a> long for a United States where we celebrate national holidays, including <a href="http://www.unagb.org/global_classrooms/gc_un_day_lessons.cfm">U.N. Day</a>, by firing automatic weapons into the air. A microcosm of how foolish we've become about guns is the recent Sixty Minutes piece titled <a href="http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=4937731n">The Way of the Gun</a>, which I had hoped would somehow involve <a href="http://www.monstersinmotion.com/catalog/images/soundtrack/3.jpg">Bruce Lee</a>, but didn't. Despite having a reasonable central theme (closing the <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gun_show">gunshow loophole</a>) Leslie Stahl still came across as slanted and shrill, and the pro-gun guy countered Stahl's "Couldn't we....make every state require a background check?" with a witty "Or we could make every state not require a background check."<br /><br />The media is partially to blame. Whenever there is a Virginia Tech or a Columbine, the media coverage is overwhelming and hacky journalists browbeat and lecture the public about gun control. This is distasteful for two reasons. First, tragedy should not be used as a convenient spring board for forwarding a political agenda. Second, TWO has long wondered why the media treats 25 people killed in the same place as more important than 25 people killed in different locations around the country. If gun violence is rampant and unacceptable then it's newsworthy. It shouldn't take an anomalous event to stir journalists from their torpor.<br /><br />The people are also to blame. When something enters the "culture war" realm, forget about having any serious discussion on the merits. Aside from discussions about abortion and gay marriage or any debate occurring within six months of a presidential election, an intelligent dialogue about guns is one of the most difficult to come by. No one really cares any more about what the actual utility to society is of gun availability and gun control. Arguments boil down to "We need to ban guns to protect ourselves from the gun violence!" and "We need more guns to protect ourselves from the gun violence!" and never get much further. And, in the end, both are really just guises for saying "I'm a liberal" and "I hate liberals", respectively.<br /><br />This is reflected not only in things like the Sixty Minutes piece, but also in the information universities, lobbying groups, government institutions and think tanks produce. TWO was amazed, when researching for this entry, how little meaningful information there was that could contribute to a discussion on gun control. Figures about crimes committed with legally held guns versus illegally held guns are, aside from anecdotes, virtually non-existent. There are no real estimates on how illegally held guns become illegal. Are they smuggled into the country? Purchased privately? Aside from <a href="http://www.endgunviolence.com/index.asp?Type=B_BASIC&SEC=%7B0D44C5F1-C425-4ACA-B209-0D51F4F97474%7D&DE=%7B1C3AEAA2-6A37-432B-BA41-F69559363127%7D">vague anecdotes</a>, no one knows. While there is some good info <a href="http://webapp.cdc.gov/sasweb/ncipc/mortrate10_sy.html">here</a> and <a href="http://www.ojp.usdoj.gov/bjs/">here</a> and <a href="http://www.atf.gov/firearms/index.htm">here</a>, there is not a lot, in my opinion, that would help quantify and predict the effect on society of more or less gun control.<br /><br />Below I present some basic facts and a premise that reasonable people should accept and then three suggestions for improvement. I realize that this may come across as a bit preachy, but then again, you are reading my blog.<br /><br />1) Accept the basic facts:<br /><br />- Citizens have a right to own weapons. The 2nd Amendment is clearly written and has been<a href="http://www.usnews.com/articles/news/national/2008/06/26/behind-the-supreme-courts-gun-decision.html"> interpreted by the Supreme Court</a> as providing an individual right.<br /><br />- Legally owned weapons are involved in so few crimes and accidents that it should really be viewed as negligible.<br /><br />- Under current laws, an increase in legal guns equals an increase in illegal guns. When the gunshow loop hole (described in link above) is combined with straw purchasers (people with clear FBI background checks who purchase weapons for criminals) there are essentially no actual barriers to criminals purchasing firearms.<br /><br />2) Accepting the above as facts, and operating under the premise that reasonable people want others to be able to protect themselves but want to minimize the likelihood of gun violence, TWO offers the following:<br /><br />- The gunshow loophole must be closed. The gunshow loophole, as described above, is a crazy exception to the rule that all purchasers at a gunshow must have FBI background checks -- that is, if you buy from a private person (not a dealer) at a gunshow, you do NOT have to have your background checked. In the Sixty Minutes clip, the gun guy's only argument against this was that the 2nd amendment doesn't require a background check. I half expected him to put on an oversized styrofoam hat and <a href="http://www.nonstick.com/characters/sam.html">start shooting pistols in the air</a>.<br /><br />Yosemite Sam aside, there are <a href="http://www.nraila.org/GunLaws/Federal/Read.aspx?id=60">all kinds of federal gun laws</a> on the books that limit people's ability to own and transfer guns. A law primarily geared to stop sales of guns to people who are already ineligible to use them would seem to not further infringe anyone's gun rights. And the limitation on sales by the legal owner is not more onerous than already existing laws. All reasonable people should support federal laws closing the gunshow loophole. <br /><br />- Second, rather than forcing an automatic weapons ban (which won't pass anyway) down the throats of the NRA and the millions of Americans who want them - consider a more novel approach. Our premise was that we wanted people to be able to protect themselves while limiting gun violence. Automatic weapons are good for protection, but in the wrong hands, can be abnormally and extremely dangerous. As such, statutory or strict liability imposed on the registered owner of any automatic weapon could be very effective in thwarting haphazard gun sales and more fairly distributing blame to culpable parties. Unless reported as stolen, the registered owner (or dealer/corporation) would retain some liability for criminal acts by a third party and would likely think twice <a href="http://www.bradycampaign.org/media/release.php?release=498">before selling to someone under the table or out the back door</a>. While this is a somewhat progressive idea, it is not without <a href="http://www.gunlawsuits.org/features/articles/tort.php">some precedent</a>.<br /><br />- Third, a limit on bulk sales to individuals will help slow the trickle of guns to criminals through straw purchasers. A limit to one automatic weapon every 1 or 2 months is hardly draconian (shockingly, some people go their whole lives without owning a single automatic weapon) and would not prevent ordinary, law abiding citizens from protecting themselves. Meanwhile, it would be an important step towards limiting the availability of weapons for criminals.<br /><br />In conclusion, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQ2BmClJflk">bang bang</a>.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-91746353787647425112009-04-15T09:02:00.000-07:002009-04-15T13:45:43.605-07:00Legal Ombudsman: Aspiring Hardcore Lawyers<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ5TDBxBc7Y0MfWfrvvIo2vRtTHA3ihD9vEJOP9s7SFMtuT3nvjYpiX8jR2iZ-DLLB69UcbKD-Dyv1L98x9xBef4flZkDUhpKAmPqZssfMS6i4vsawOg28u7TmQcPuwTW0ZVxNKx_5YU0X/s1600-h/Law+Books_iStock_000000290768XSmall.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ5TDBxBc7Y0MfWfrvvIo2vRtTHA3ihD9vEJOP9s7SFMtuT3nvjYpiX8jR2iZ-DLLB69UcbKD-Dyv1L98x9xBef4flZkDUhpKAmPqZssfMS6i4vsawOg28u7TmQcPuwTW0ZVxNKx_5YU0X/s320/Law+Books_iStock_000000290768XSmall.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5325006521795786770" border="0" /></a><br />Res ipsa loquitur.<br /><br />Apparently April 14 was <a href="http://www.bekindtolawyers.com/">National Be Kind To Lawyers Day</a>. TWO apologizes for not being au courant with lawyer holidays, but feels better knowing that his favorite legal blog, <a href="http://www.abovethelaw.com/">Above The Law</a>, nearly forgot <a href="http://abovethelaw.com/2009/04/today_is_national_be_kind_to_l.php">as well</a>.<br /><br />TWO has been lucky enough to befriend many young lawyers in New York who are normal, cool, friendly people. However, the very existence of National Be Kind To Lawyers Day implies that most lawyers aren't normal, cool or friendly. And that's correct. Socially awkward, insecure and, at times, angry people - what we will call hardcore lawyers - make up a majority of the profession, at least among big law firms. Therefore, for aspiring young associates, particularly those in Big Law - TWO presents the following tips for becoming a hardcore lawyer:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) Your background.</span> Its best if your background makes others feel inferior, but it must at least illustrate that you are on par with your colleagues. If you went to a top 10 or 20 law school there's no problem. Casually bring up your law school when you tell hilarious stories about drinking with your "Columbia Law friends" in Harlem. Harlem!!! If you went to a lower tier law school, always provide some sort of disclaimer, implying that you could have gone to nearly any other law school were it not for this particular circumstance. "Oh - Harvard? Yeah a ton of my friends went to law school there. I got a scholarship at Northeastern though, so...." Specialization is also a good trick: "I went to Brooklyn Law. Yeah, I was really interested in maritime law when I was looking at schools, and they have a great program there. I love the seas."<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2) Your appearance.</span> If you're a male, it is crucial that you pay a custom clothier, probably the one who wanders around your office from time to time, to make you a couple of outfits. That way, when someone asks you about where you got something you can interrupt them and say "Oh, I have a guy." This implies that the <a href="http://www.thomaspink.com/">Thomas Pink</a>, <a href="http://www.josbank.com/HomePage.process">Jos. A. Bank</a> or <a href="http://www.brooksbrothers.com/">Brooks Brothers</a> ensemble thrown together by the questioner just doesn't measure up to your discriminating tastes in style and fit. Also, <a href="http://www.cufflinks.com/">cufflinks</a>. Always. On every shirt. Even pajama tops.<br /><br />If you're a female, always wear flats. Heels are for the hot lawyer girls who aren't as hardcore as you are, and also you hate them. An important sartorial move that says "I'm a chick lawyer making in the mid $200s" is to develop some special niche area where you will spend an inordinate amount of money. Two prominent examples are <a href="http://www.saksfifthavenue.com/main/ProductArray.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374306418111&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524446162496&ASSORTMENT%3C%3East_id=1408474399545537&bmUID=1239821282245&use_parent=1&SECSLOT=LN-New+Arrivals">handbags</a> and <a href="http://www.neimanmarcus.com/store/catalog/templates/P9.jhtml;jsessionid=5KSIKUE5YVUHCCQAAKQRAGY?itemId=cat17850768&parentId=cat13030734&masterId=cat000141">shoes</a>. While you may not be able to wear the shoes you buy to the office, talk openly about what a <span style="font-style: italic;">huge problem</span> you have spending <span style="font-style: italic;">way too much</span> on shoes and then laugh, faux-self-disparagingly, at your own lack of discipline - HAHAHA. And then walk away feeling good because now other people know you have <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mUq1hWELKd0">serious money</a> from being a hardcore lawyer.<br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"><br />3)Your workload.</span> You're incredibly busy. And the people should know. Accomplish this by remarking to everyone who happens into your office that you are totally exhausted from last night's due diligence/waiting for the client's mark up/seamless web mishap, whatever. You can never be well-rested. Tell law clerks and first year associates that you hate your job. This will give them the impression that you're just a normal guy or girl who doesn't like staying up late. But you know, and they probably do too, that you love it because it makes you feel serious. Finally - and this is an important step - regularly update your facebook status if you're in the office on a weekend or after 11pm on a weekday: "<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-0ha0NlRNk">Sam Sweet</a> <span style="font-style: italic;">is drafting an intercreditor agreement</span> [1:31 am-Comment-Like]" and "<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y4l0BS3RPvc">Blossom Russo</a> <span style="font-style: italic;">is document requests</span> [11:04 pm-Comment-Like]" and "<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47XaK4XJxFQ">Jan Hammer</a> <span style="font-style: italic;">hates working on a Sunday but is looking forward to his reunion w law school friends from Temple (where he got a scholarship)!!!</span> [3:24pm-Comment-Like]"<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">4) Your expertise.</span> By the time you're a third year associate, start playing up your expertise. When a deal you've been assigned to closes, take full credit. Say things like "I just closed a 1.1 billion dollar deal" even though in reality you were sent to a closing room somewhere and made to sit in an office with signature pages until a partner or senior associate, who actually closed the deal, called you and told you that you could return. Another move is to begin offering financial commentary. Despite the fact that your first few years as a lawyer have consisted primarily of word processing, quickly looking over organizational documents and avoiding pro bono assignments, you should give the impression that you have somehow acquired nuanced insights into financial markets unavailable to the layman. Tell people you're "bearish on equities" and bullish on something something. It can be anything. People will nod, look at your cufflinks, and think "This guy is a serious businessman!"<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">5) </span><span style="font-weight: bold;">Your superiority</span>. One thing the hardcore lawyer does is to furiously vent to other lawyers about other law firms and law schools, either in person, over email or by leaving angry comments on legal blogs. Here is a quick guide. Every <a href="http://www.vault.com/lawschool/rankingtop25/">law school</a> or <a href="http://www.vault.com/nr/lawrankings.jsp?law2009=2&ch_id=242&top100=1">law firm</a> that is ranked behind yours in the <a href="http://www.vault.com/">Vault Rankings</a>, whether by one spot or 100 spots, should be referred to as TTT - third tier toilet. This can be done outright or by cleverly inserting it into the name of the institution you wish to denigrate: "Ha! I would never work for CovingTTTon!" This uproarious rhetorical device never gets old and will be absolutely hilarious to other hardcore lawyers. Any law firm ranked better than yours should be treated with unfettered, undiluted hatred. If you can find a story about a case they ruined, bring it up constantly and sound amazed that they could be considered better than your shop. That reminds me - sometimes you should refer to law firms as "shops." Shhh shhh shhh don't ask why just do it. Finally, if all else fails on a legal blog, try to find a typo in an earlier post.<br /><br />Follow these steps and you'll be on your way to shedding your useless traits and acquiring the important ones. Once you've done that, invite me to a summer lunch at <a href="http://www.gramercytavern.com/">Gramercy Tavern</a>.<br /><br />In conclusion, <a href="http://nymag.com/news/features/55863/">Marc Dreier</a> and I are <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=27xt1XjzD1g">taking out some clients</a> this weekend if anyone wants to join.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;"></span>Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-9263351898590472002009-04-13T12:48:00.000-07:002009-04-13T16:20:53.117-07:00Weekend Ombudsman: MusingsI have varied interests.<br /><br />TWO spent a lot of time thinking this weekend. Here are some musings:<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) The Masters.</span> Is there any other sport where the fans dress exactly like the athletes? Golfers all have their own style, from the <a href="http://imgsrv.pointradio.com/image/wpte/UserFiles/Image/WooWoo/TigerWoods.jpg">understated</a>, to the <a href="http://fotosa.ru/stock_photo/Fancy%20by%20Veer/p_2711567.jpg">full-vest/visor accoutrement ensemble</a>, to the late great <a href="http://www.watervillegolfclub.ie/images/pic_payne2_lg.jpg">Payne Stewart</a>, who did his <a href="http://www.mytruecard.com/payne1989british.jpg">own thing</a>. Here Payne appears to be <a href="http://dascoop.files.wordpress.com/2008/04/w301payne-stewart-1989-pga-championship-posters.jpg">playing golf for the Chicago Bears</a>. I miss Payne Stewart.<br /><br />But back to the issue. So I will accept the actual golfers wearing whatever they feel they need to to compete. But why is it necessary for <a href="http://img.timeinc.net/golf/i/tours/2009/03/masters-crowd_800x305.jpg">fans (ignore numbering)</a> to dress <a href="http://sportsmed.starwave.com/media/pga/2002/0411/photo/gallery11.jpg">the same way</a>? Yeah, honey - I've got tickets to the Masters...have you seen my golf pants, three button shirt, <a href="http://www.a2zsportsdirect.com/Qstore/uploads/8927_lg.jpg">functionless golf vest</a> and <a href="http://www.scorelow.com/item--PING-Men-s-Mesh-Golf-Visor-2009-Navy--PING09SMVISORNVY.html">PING sun visor</a> - I should probably bring my glove too, just in case.<br /><br />Its as if each fan is hoping that, against all odds, Phil Mickelson might turn to them in the gallery and say - "Hey... you...yeah....you look like you know golf. Why don't you come out here and talk to me about this next hole. Hell - do you want to hit for me?"<br /><br />"Why YES! Its a good thing I wore all my golf gear!"<br /><br />Can you imagine this in any other sport? Do you see fans at a basketball game wearing high tops, ankles taped, headbands on, mouth guards in? Are women in the stands at Wimbledon wearing wristbands and tennis skirts - like a tennis match could break out at any point on their way to the ladies room and concession stand?<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2. Economics.</span> Two things interested TWO this weekend: price stickiness and stock market projections.<br /><br />First, free market proponents (of which TWO is one) hail the ability of prices to fluctuate relatively quickly to reflect market conditions. However there are some areas where this does not happen. One area - a particularly troubling one - is commercial real estate. In New York City for example, where unemployment is skyrocketing, incomes and spending are falling, and businesses are failing, one would expect that rents charged to commercial tenants would decrease across the board. They have not. Many landlords have increased their rents up to 6%. As a result, businesses are closing their doors all over the city. Why?<br /><br />The answer is that commercial rents typically lag well behind residential rents. Most of the commercial landlords have earned so much money from rents over the life of their holdings, that they can afford to receive no rent for extended periods of time. Banking on the fact that the economy will recover eventually, these landlords would rather get nothing for a year or so than lower rents and lock themselves into a 10 year lease at a rate that will be, in a few years, viewed as beneath market value.<br /><br />While the landlords' behavior could be viewed as rational on a certain time horizon, it undeniably acts to sink us deeper into recession. TWO knows of a number of entrepreneurs interested in starting new businesses that have not been able to because of unreasonably high rents. The aggregated effects of this are immense when one considers that more than half (<a href="http://www.blogger.com/TWO%20knows%20of%20a%20number%20of%20entrepreneurs%20interested%20in%20starting%20new%20businesses%20that%20have%20not%20been%20able%20to%20because%20of%20unreasonably%20high%20rents.">51% in 2004</a>) of all employed people work for small businesses (defined as companies with less than 500 employees).<br /><br />Second, many of you may have heard about investment houses issuing internal projections of 10% or more gains in equities by the end of 2009. Many think that this signals the beginning of the end of the economic downturn. They should think again.<br /><br />Increases in equities can not be viewed outside of the context of money supply and spending levels. The deficit is already <a href="http://www.thenewamerican.com/economy/commentary-mainmenu-43/991">nearly $1 trillion</a>, only half way through 2009. This is two times the highest-ever annual deficit. Barring increases in actual production, all of this spending - mostly funded by simply printing more money - will manifest itself in inflation. Inflationary periods are typically times when the bond market suffers (creditors are hurt and debtors are helped) and equity markets can do well, in <span style="font-style: italic;">nominal</span> terms. However, in real terms, there is no reason to think that equity gains - if any - will signify any actual improvement in our economy - and in fact there is some reason to think that it might signify a dangerously inflation.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3. Boxing</span>. Three things. First, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4eTkO8rWJs">Paul Williams</a>, who dominated Winky Wright on Saturday, should never lose a fight. He is a 6 foot 2 inch boxer who fights anywhere from 147 - 160. He has an 82 inch wingspan and throws over 100 punches a round. He was - somehow - upset in one fight (in the re-match Williams avenged his loss with a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u9MlHGj2Az4">devastating 1st round knockout</a>). But that fluke aside, this guy should beat everyone at 147 and 154 and possibly even 160 (although Kelly Pavlik could be a tough matchup). Look for Williams and light-heavyweight <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TTRCMp_8d7I">Chad Dawson</a> (with honorable mention to welterweight <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHm6Y1H0ifU">Andre Berto</a>) to be the next great American boxing stars.<br /><br />I purposely did not mention Chris Arreola. I am a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRsvwztQwR4">Chris Arreola</a> fan - he has <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iVxx035biI">an aggressive and fan-friendly style</a> in the ring and star quality (complete with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTPUdzCMyVc">amazing interviews</a>) outside of it. But before Arreola can convince me that he is ready to be the Mexican Tyson, he will have to show up for big fights <a href="http://www.nowboxing.com/wp-content/uploads/arreolavswalker.jpg">in better shape</a>. Additionally, Arreola takes a lot of hits. It is unclear how he would fare against a Klitschko were the fight to go into the late rounds and stamina became a factor.<br /><br />Third, is there any sports show better than<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NTvvcKW7W68"> 24/7</a>? The new series, of course, is about <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ju6gslHGQs8">Hatton and Pacquioa's</a> May 2nd fight. My view: I would short Pacman. I think Pacman's value is a bit inflated because of his domination of a <a href="http://gregalario.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/oscar.jpg">frail Oscar De La Hoya</a>. And because of exaggerated odds, Hatton might be the better bet. Look for odds to narrow closer to fight night.<br /><br />In conclusion, I could out-box most economists.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-82417671864372978082009-04-07T11:58:00.000-07:002009-04-08T09:51:14.136-07:00Financial Crisis Ombudsman: Accountability<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4Q979zvQxTZJ_8XBT4TSWARVynldfS2QOJTUWKTygS2qn7aO-GkeU-wwo9b4Rpa-ps4KkwW8aXwfbremeEkeLVPwUYBfKnuX35W7NVa3yLN8RzasSdIopg3rSVD46yNnN4XyMBfuhfCMQ/s1600-h/large_BarneyFrank.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 238px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4Q979zvQxTZJ_8XBT4TSWARVynldfS2QOJTUWKTygS2qn7aO-GkeU-wwo9b4Rpa-ps4KkwW8aXwfbremeEkeLVPwUYBfKnuX35W7NVa3yLN8RzasSdIopg3rSVD46yNnN4XyMBfuhfCMQ/s320/large_BarneyFrank.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5322108228498703874" border="0" /></a><br />Don't look at me.<br /><br />Today <a href="http://www.realclearpolitics.com/video/2009/04/07/harvard_student_takes_on_barney_frank_over_economy.html">this video</a> is all over the internets. Its a Harvard student asking <a href="http://www.house.gov/frank/">Barney Frank</a>, current House Representative from Massachusetts and former Harvard graduate and professor, what responsibility he feels for the current economic crisis. Frank essentially mocks the student, claims conservative conspiracy and then humbly concedes that he does, in fact, regret writing a bill to regulate hedge funds but then not trying hard enough to get it passed. This last statement, of course, is the equivalent of being on a job interview and saying that your biggest fault is working too hard and caring too much about the company.<br /><br />Lets take a step back. The basic role of government, at its very core, is to provide services for the people that the people could not readily provide for themselves, either individually or with non-governmental civic organization. These sorts of essential government services tend to be areas that are crucial to all citizens but require massive amounts of money, organization and/or oversight that ordinary citizens or groups of citizens could not take on by themselves. Examples include security (intelligence gathering, training, organization of large-scale military operations) and infrastructure (interstate highways, ports, air safety, energy, water). Also clearly falling into this category of basic goverment functions is financial oversight. While nearly all 300 million Americans have been effected by the fall out from the financial crisis, ordinary citizens for the most part would have no way of understanding the factors leading up to the crisis, let alone be able to take steps to remedy the problems.<br /><br />It is for this reason that Americans entrust power and money to elected officials. Barney Frank was paid $169,000 and his staff was paid a total of <a href="http://www.legistorm.com/member/241/Rep_Barney_Frank.html">$1.2 million</a> in 2008, figures that are on-par with the other 435 members of the house. The understanding between elected officials and the people that elect them and pay their salaries is that they will look out for the people's interests particularly in the areas mentioned above, that are important but beyond the control of the constituents. In that sense, all elected officials have dropped the ball when it comes to the financial crisis.<br /><br />But Barney Frank, in particular, had a special position that makes his tenure as an elected official even more negligent and his failure to take any responsibility even more disgraceful. Since 2003 Barney Frank has been on the House Financial Services Committee, and since 2007 has been the chairman of that committee. In its own words, "<span style="font-style: italic;">[t]he Committee oversees all components of the nation's housing and financial services sectors, including banking, insurance, real estate, public and assisted housing, and securities.</span>" This could be shortened to "<span style="font-style: italic;">the Committee is in charge of making sure a financial meltdown doesn't happen.</span>"<br /><br />And yet Frank feels no responsibility. Some selected highlights of Frank's performance:<br /><br />- In <a href="http://commdocs.house.gov/committees/bank/hba92628.000/hba92628_0f.htm">this 2003 hearing</a>, Barney Frank concludes that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are sufficiently regulated because Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac say they are. Clearly exhausted from that rigorous line of questioning, Frank concludes that there is no impending financial crisis. (see page 110).<br /><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:100%;" > Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> Let me ask Mr. Gould and Mr. Raines on behalf of Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae, do you feel that over the past years you have been substantially under-regulated?<br /> Mr. Raines?<br /> Mr. <b>RAINES.</b> No, sir.<br /> Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> Mr. Gould?<br /> Mr. <b>GOULD.</b> No, sir.<br /> Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> And let me ask now the gentleman from the Federal Home Loan Bank, do you believe that the Federal Home Loan Bank System has been substantially under-regulated?<br /> Mr. <b>HEHMAN.</b> No, sir.<br /> Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> Mr. Schultz?<br /> Mr. <b>SCHULTZ.</b> No, sir.<br /> Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> Okay. Then I am not entirely sure why we are here, but we killed the afternoon anyway, so we might as well go forward.<br /> I must say, I am inclined to agree with that. I don't see any financial crisis. You can always make things better, but I do think we should dispel the notion that we are here because there is something rotten that has gone on.</span><br /><br />Incidentally, Franklin Raines was fired in 2004 for grossly overstating earnings and, along with two others, <a href="http://www.webcpa.com/article.cfm?articleid=22660">charged</a> with 101 civil counts related to the manipulation in 2006.<br /><br />- In <a href="http://commdocs.house.gov/committees/bank/hba97754.000/hba97754_0f.htm">this 2004 hearing</a> on the safety of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, Frank insists that serious issues with their financial statements and internal controls don't effect their safety and soundness, since they won't go immediately insolvent. (see pages 108-110).<br /><br />(edited)<br /><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:100%;" > Mr. <b>FALCON.</b> Just the very fact that we have serious doubts about the accuracy of the financial statements and their books and records, the very fact that we have identified very serious internal controls——<br /></span><span style="font-style: italic;font-size:100%;" > Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> Well, let me ask a question.....Does any accuracy threaten the safety and soundness? That is what bothers me. There is a quality and a quantity issue here.......To throw ''safety and soundness'' around in that thing I think really is, for a regulator, irresponsible.<br /> Mr. <b>FALCON.</b> Well, I think internal controls are a very serious safety and soundness concern. A breakdown or a lack of internal controls——<br /> Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> Do you think the safety and soundness is at risk right now?<br /> Mr. <b>FALCON.</b> Are they at risk of becoming insolvent right now? No. We have an agreement with the board in place that will address these problems, provide an adequate capital cushion. We think we——<br /> Mr. <b>FRANK.</b> That is the answer. The rest is just rhetoric</span><span style="font-style: italic;">.</span><br /><br />Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, after losing $14.9 billion and facing potential insolvency, were placed under government control in 2008.<br /><br />- In 2005 and 2006, Frank sponsored 34 bills. Only 2 had anything to do with subjects related to the current financial crisis (<a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h109-4291">H.R. 4291</a> and <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h109-5712">H.R. 5712</a>) and neither became law. Frank did find time to pass House Resolution 86, a <a href="http://thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/bdquery/D?d109:1:./temp/%7EbdfrML::%7C/bss/d109query.html%7C">congratulations</a> to the New England Patriots for winning the Super Bowl.<br /><br />- In 2007 and 2008, while the economy fell apart and millions lost their jobs, Frank, now chairman of the Financial Services Committee, sponsored 70 bills, 6 having to do with relevant economic issues, (<a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-1257">HR. 1257</a>, <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-3526">HR 3526</a>, <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-3838">HR3838</a>, <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-1427">HR 1427</a>, <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-7321">HR 7321</a> and <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-3915">HR 3915</a>). None of the six became law, but 4 did at least pass the House. Meanwhile, his Financial Services Committee saw 521 bills and 109 were passed by the house. Of those 109, maybe 4 (<a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-698">HR 698</a>, <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-890">HR 890</a>, <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-5140">HR 5140</a> and <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-6312">HR 6312</a>) in addition to Frank's 4 (mentioned above) were on topics at all pertinent to the financial meltdown. Other than H.R. 5140 - the 2008 Economic Stimulus (not written by Frank or anyone in the Financial Services Committee), none became law.<br /><br />While the Finacial Services Committee, under Frank's guidance, could not seem to pass anything that would have saved the people of this country from economic catastrophe, they were a tour de force when it came to minting coins. TWO would like to commend the House Financial Services Committee for being instrumental in minting coins to commemorate the <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-2268">centennial of Mothers Day</a>, the <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-2358">contributions of Indian tribes</a>, the <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-2750">50th anniversary of NASA</a>, the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TrUBew57FS0">contributions of singer Eddie Money</a>, the <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-5714">founding of the US Army in 1775</a>, the <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-2894">bicentennial of the Star Spangled Banner</a>, the <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-2040">semicentennial of the Civil Rights Act</a>, the <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-5872">Boy Scouts</a> and <a href="http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bill.xpd?bill=h110-3229">the legacy of the US Infantry</a>. I made up the one about Eddie Money, but <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bFR6EO5-cjE">he probably</a> deserves one too.<br /><br />- And now its 2009. Barney Frank and other elected officials - Republican and Democrat - are trying to cover themselves. They are pointing fingers, talking about committees they're on, how they attended important hearings and sponsored important bills.<br /><br />But nothing can undo the fact that an economic disaster occurred and all we got from the Financial Services Committee were commemorative coins. And its not an accident. Voting on commemorative coins is easy. It requires no difficult due diligence. It doesn't entail understanding complex concepts, upsetting powerful institutions or risking campaign funding. And, most importantly, if the people aren't calling for it, why risk getting involved in anything that could upset the chances of reelection?<br /><br />And therein lies the disconnect. The people weren't calling for oversight on banks, credit derivatives, government sponsored entities etc from 2003 - 2007 because most of them didn't realize there was a problem. Most people are working 9-5, taking their kids to school, paying bills and living their lives. They don't have the time or the means to investigate, understand or have an impact on these issues. They pay their taxes with the understanding that elected officials and their staffs will be the ones spending time asking the serious questions, doing unglamorous and painstaking research and fighting to pass bills that matter.<br /><br />This is not a partisan issue. Blame lies on the Bush Administration, the Fed (particularly Allen Greenspan) and members in both houses of Congress in addition to obvious culpability (at least for recklessness) on the part of many financial institutions.<br /><br />But I find it particularly disheartening, and, indeed, insulting, when an elected official specifically charged with financial oversight not only does not do his job, but, upon challenge from a constituent, has the audacity to mock and deride the questioner while at the same time accepting no accountability for his failures - as if the financial crisis were some independent, unforeseeable act of God.<br /><br />In conclusion, this is further evidence that we'd be better off governed "<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sN_h9bWZuuk">by the first 2000 names in the Boston telephone book than by the faculty at Harvard.</a>"Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-52670341182251335982009-04-02T12:06:00.000-07:002009-04-02T17:38:32.906-07:00Cinema Ombudsman: Paul Blart Observes & ReportsAll the good ideas have been used up.<br /><br />Thats the only explanation as to why <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ekAQzff95E8">Observe & Report</a>, a comedy about an overweight mall security guard facing a threat to his mall, would be coming out next Friday, approximately three months after the opening of <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OnBgXGNaQ5k">Paul Blart: Mall Cop</a>, a comedy about an overweight mall security guard facing a threat to his mall.<br /><br />Both films contain silly clips of fat people running and some obligatory ethnic humor (they don't speak like us - HA!).<br /><br />Here is, then, the second installment (first installment <a href="http://theworldsombudsman.blogspot.com/2009/01/cinema-ombudsman-defiance-ground-hog.html">here</a>) of our wildly popular series of little known but incredible factual events that should definitely have movies made about them.<br /><br />1) Elijah Lovejoy. Reverend Elijah Lovejoy was an ostracized but unwavering abolitionist who preached and wrote anti-slavery articles in Alton, Illinois. He was widely despised for his views, and in November, 1837, Reverend Lovejoy was finally <a href="http://www.altonweb.com/history/lovejoy/warehouse.jpg">killed by an angry mob</a> who attacked him in his printing warehouse and threw his printing press in the Mississippi River. He is considered a martyr and symbolicly the "first casualty of the Civil War." <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL-1GDYj6oIgAO1fOiVQRCdntlBsErS_CtQOIjirP9rpV07fc1UuN_INf4BZFY3RCk0RsCW1QlG7h7Y6IcbvYKF1rXMxSbDgqSAr5ZJ_ebPt40OBMoxvlF4bpDVB2BV4U-IF5XLqBMSM4/s320/Elijah_Lovejoy.jpg">Reverend Elijah Lovejoy</a> is played brilliantly by <a href="http://image.comicvine.com/uploads/item/9000/8933/147840-reverend-lovejoy_400.jpg">Reverend Timothy Lovejoy</a> in this animated film for the whole family.<br /><br />2) The Forgotten War. In 1942 the Japanese invaded the Alleutian Islands, a small but strategically crucial island chain near Alaska. The <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3nB6XwbzHg4">U.S. took nearly a year</a> to drive the Japanese out, in <a href="http://zen-martialarts.org/Dharma/zbohy/Literature/Images/AttuSnow.jpg">mountainous, snowy battles</a> that were bloody and frequently hand-to-hand. A last gasp Japanese counterattack saw one of the largest bonzai charges of the entire war. Thousands were killed. <a href="http://www.vanillaafro.com/images/will-ferrell.gif">Will Ferrell is miscast as Sergeant Sidney Sweet</a> with <a href="http://www.contactmusic.com/pics/m/jackie_chan_3_230508/jackie_chan_1881806.jpg">Jackie Chan</a> as a tightly wound <a href="http://www.hlswilliwaw.com/aleutians/Attu/images/moreska-nick/attu-nickmoreska-quanset.jpg">Colonel Yamasaki</a> in this action thriller.<br /><br />3) Oh - how about maniac anarchist meth-head rednecks living in bizarre compounds in the northern California forest? Its true. Its happening right now. Here's a picture TWO's friend took last week of signs just inside one of the fenced in compounds while traveling near Oroville, California.<br /><div style="text-align: center;"><a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_1qcU3b9_8Ojt2W98AhRs7utEl1ActR1iM1NN16F3h9KynEu4y5rYfVB_6KSABWtRqYevMHQC_jTUEzOhPpZWKYk57o26LGTF6got9AIeqGJATY9N_XdNivH0koyfc9zFmNyUOlm_7dda/s1600-h/IMG_2273.JPG"><img style="cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_1qcU3b9_8Ojt2W98AhRs7utEl1ActR1iM1NN16F3h9KynEu4y5rYfVB_6KSABWtRqYevMHQC_jTUEzOhPpZWKYk57o26LGTF6got9AIeqGJATY9N_XdNivH0koyfc9zFmNyUOlm_7dda/s400/IMG_2273.JPG" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5320204016737125842" border="0" /></a><br /></div><br />This horror flick stars <a href="http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/billy-bob-thornton.jpg">Billy Bob Thornton</a> and <a href="http://www.gossipsauce.com/files/gs_parker_posey_080801_m.jpg">Parker Posey</a> as strung out, flesh eating zombie sect leaders and <a href="http://images.hollywoodgrind.com:9000/images/2008/6/seth-rogan-green-hornet.jpg">Seth Rogen</a> as Ranger Tom, whose first day as a park ranger after years as a mall cop is more than he bargained for. Tom must save terrified camper <a href="http://images.allmoviephoto.com/2005_House_of_Wax/2005_house_of_wax_013.jpg">Sissy Bergans (Paris Hilton)</a> who is chased through the woods by the sect's <a href="http://www.mythfolklore.net/3043mythfolklore/images/oz/oz_movie_monkey.jpg">winged-monkeys</a>, played by the <a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_dUcNeiSkScE/RgqVp6Ov1MI/AAAAAAAAABE/TA9upRHPLbU/s320/olsen-twins-paris-fashion-week-01.jpg">Olsen twins</a>. Spoiler alert! The sect devours Sissy and Ranger Tom.<br /><br />4) Alaric, conflicted warrior. Alaric was a Visigoth leader in the early 5th century and launched an aggressive campaign against Rome, who he felt had betrayed him. Over the next 10 years, he travelled all over Europe, was spoken to by a voice from the sky, had his wife captured, and launched several sieges. On the one hand, some of his methods were brutal. On the other, when he finally took Rome, the first to do so in nearly a thousand years, he and his army apparently made unheard of attempts to spare lives and preserve many of the buildings and sacred places in the city. In the performances of his life, <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPKAtHHgO2zTEuItz12y3IsUwxudbn-fLf266eeR0uRxe9My1Lkw57eXjwmxYDXTXb_LSln98niErI_zpYvC6HfSAG-EUbdRnIQ9mMdcBeJYnKvoti0N6LEXNCds2A1VZ1bblS7WUDvbRz/s320/joaquin_phoenix_beard.jpg">Joaquin Phoenix</a> is <a href="http://www.hist-europe.fr/Rome3/images/AlaricTheGothDetail.jpg">Alaric</a> and <a href="http://www.kinoweb.de/film2000/Gladiator/pix/glm.jpg">Joaquin Phoenix</a> is <a href="http://www.nndb.com/people/122/000097828/stilicho-1.jpg">Flavius Stilicho</a>. Brilliant!<br /><br />5) Is <a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23984857/">this</a> the most unbelievable true story of the past 5 years? A young husband shoots himself, committing suicide. His heart is donated to an old man, far away, giving the old man a second chance at life. The young widow begins receiving letters from the old man with her ex-husband's heart, thanking her for extending his life. They finally decide to meet, fall instantly in love and marry. 12 years later the old man kills himself as well. <a href="http://www.judiciaryreport.com/images/jennifer_aniston_on_beach.jpg">Jennifer Aniston</a>, <a href="http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2008/04/01-07/adam-sandler-sadie-bedtime-stories-disney-basketball-ankle-break-broken-courteney-cox-keri-russell-movie-set.jpg">Adam Sandler</a> and <a href="http://www.myfavouritejew.com/clientimages/09bbd5c083337c1d236c50e6377larry_david_photo.jpg">Larry David</a> shine in this uproarious comedy.<br /><br />In conclusion, TWO is full of interesting facts.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-61697581996491524162009-03-30T11:55:00.000-07:002009-03-30T14:58:34.290-07:00College Basketball Ombudsman: Mid Majors Take 2TWO's longtime friend, frequent debate loser and sometime muse, Gus Johnson's Whisper, wrote a <a href="http://gusjohnsonswhisper.blogspot.com/2009/03/no-mid-majors-no-problem.html">blog entry</a> countering TWO's <a href="http://theworldsombudsman.blogspot.com/2009/03/college-sports-ombudsman-unprecedented.html">previous entry arguing for more mid-majors in the NCAA tournament</a>. GJW, for reasons known only to him, screamed like <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ogZeQ-fTL2U">a school girl during a Jonas Brothers sighting</a> when he learned of the inclusion of Arizona, Maryland and Wisconsin in the tournament field. Humorous similes aside, GJW is a fan of the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ZBoPlCzuRY">Jonas Brothers</a>. Just stating facts here.<br /><br />I will attempt to summarize his argument so that you will not have to wade through the general <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Abky6hbKPpg">incoherence and disorganization</a> of his piece. It essentially breaks down into a few ideas:<br /><br />- He breaks up mid-majors into two categories, mid majors from the A-10 and "Boppers" (bottom-toppers) which are good teams from terrible conferences.<br /><br />- He shows that in this and in previous years, most of the final 4, final 8 and final 16 were teams from BCS conferences, not "Boppers".<br /><br />- He shows that a high percentage of "Bopper" teams do not make any sort of tournament runs, and that Arizona, Maryland, Wisconsin and Michigan (this year's questionable at-large teams) each won at least one game.<br /><br />- He propounds that, in some years, when the BCS conferences are down, midmajors deserve more bids, but this year was not one of those years.<br /><br />Unfortunately for GJW, his argument, in addition to following no known logical progression, is also mostly unresponsive to mine.<br /><br />First of all, trying to remove Xavier and Temple from the ranks of mid-major is a bit self-serving, but ultimately inconsequential for this discussion.<br /><br />Second, the fact that the teams advancing in the tournament are mostly BCS schools should suprise no one. Generally the very best teams are from BCS conferences. They get the most bids. In a bad year for BCS schools, they get 24 of the 34 at-large bids, and in a good year (like this one) they get 30 out of the 34. It makes sense that there would be more BCS schools advancing deep into the tournament. At no point was TWO arguing that midmajors, or a high percentage of midmajors, will be regularly advancing to the Final 4.<br /><br />The argument, rather, is about teams on the margins. Bubble BCS teams vs Bubble midmajor teams. When the selection committee had 4 remaining at-large selections (having given out 26 of the previous 30 to BCS schools), they had a choice between BCS teams like Arizona, Wisconsin and Maryland and midmajors like Creighton, St. Mary's and Davidson.<br /><br />Why should they have picked the latter?<br /><br />1) The NCAA selection committee has a responsibility to pick a field for the tournament that will both provide an opportunity for the top teams to play and be enjoyable for students, fans, and the viewing public.<br /><br />2) The BCS teams have proven, beyond a doubt, that they are not top teams. There is plenty of information available to suggest that these schools will not get very far in the tournament. When you play 16 ACC games and lose 9 of them, <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb/clubhouse?teamId=120">as Maryland did</a>, sure, you might have a good game and beat a 7th seed, but then you will do as you did all season long, and get handled by a top team (Memphis blew out Maryland in the next round).<br /><br />3) The midmajors - or Boppers - are more mysterious, but are likely not top teams either. They have not played as much top competition. There is a strong likelihood that these schools will, like the BCS bubble teams, get handled early in the tournament. GJW correctly points out that only one or two midmajors, if any, make significant tournament runs each year.<br /><br />4) Because of the lack of information on midmajors, however, once every couple of years there is a midmajor team drastically, drastically undervalued that actually is a top team. Davidson - which in 2006 lost to eventual national champion Kansas by 2 points in the Elite 8 - was a 10 seed. George Mason made it to the final 4 in 2006 as an 11 seed and, prior to their run, were famously told that they "didn't belong" in the tournament by <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_0xjkkuPr0">Billy Packer</a>.<br /><br />5) Somewhat more sentimentally, the public LOVES <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bxKNd94h1zY">Cinderella runs</a> and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YlkY-qb1dVk">upsets</a>, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nLE_bT_Zn7U">no matter</a> the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QTev5pSuYLk">sport</a>. No one, not even graduates of the school, will remember that Arizona beat Utah and Cleveland State and then got beaten by 40 points by Louisville, but everyone remembers Cinderella runs of Davidson and George Mason. I don't think its unrelated that this is <a href="http://www.indystar.com/article/20090328/SPORTS15/903280437/1004/SPORTS">widely considered</a> the most boring NCAA tournament in recent years.<br /><br />6) Because choosing BCS bubble schools over midmajor bubble schools risks that a top team will not make the tournament (even if this is the case only once every two or three years), while the reverse choice does not run any comparable risk, coupled with the enjoyment fans get out of seeing smaller schools play against big schools leads me to once again aver that the NCAA Selection Committee should select more midmajor at-large teams.<br /><br />If anyone is wondering what trip you just took with me over the last 6 paragraphs, its called a logical progression.<br /><br />This weekend's upset prediction: Michigan State over UConn. Thabeet gets in foul trouble.<br /><br />In conclusion, Dr. Octagon was GJW's pediatrician during his formative years.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-78336164270327514982009-03-27T12:27:00.000-07:002009-03-27T15:09:53.589-07:00Humor Ombudsman: Tiger Woods ImpressionYou know whats great? Being right about Villanova beating Duke.<br /><br />Lets celebrate by watching a totally unrelated but really funny Tiger Woods impression on the radio.<br /><br /><object width="425" height="344"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/Twb1CL0Oiqo&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/Twb1CL0Oiqo&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"></embed></object><br /><br />In conclusion, TWO once won 50,000 dirhams off Bob Costas at a backgammon tournament in Rabat.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-68639079286421425902009-03-24T12:52:00.000-07:002009-03-24T16:58:14.525-07:00NCAA Tournament Ombudsman: Sponsored by Buffalo Wild Wings<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCh2p8Ac3gZti0ts-jrFtzp_14ERTQvi4DJNYvq42Vcq-v5dkKyOUlyt6K2PvCK7YpU3UFxr61TtngyiJO0ItLeDja0woOrC2ysTsnTorGwyIUuFobw0Rl78bJ3UUV5y39OugQIjNNjmHy/s1600-h/Buffalo+Wild+Wings+4CPWhiteBorderTag.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 400px; height: 309px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCh2p8Ac3gZti0ts-jrFtzp_14ERTQvi4DJNYvq42Vcq-v5dkKyOUlyt6K2PvCK7YpU3UFxr61TtngyiJO0ItLeDja0woOrC2ysTsnTorGwyIUuFobw0Rl78bJ3UUV5y39OugQIjNNjmHy/s400/Buffalo+Wild+Wings+4CPWhiteBorderTag.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5316897295132867282" border="0" /></a><br />After a weekend of total mayhem and madness, TWO has collected himself and is prepared to share the following reflections on the NCAA tourney's opening rounds.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) Arizona.</span> Some of you may have interpreted last week's "I can't wait for their Cinderella run" statement as sarcasm, implying that Arizona didn't belong in the tournament and wouldn't make a run. It wasn't sarcasm...incredibly accurate prediction. Humors aside, I will admit that Arizona, stunningly, has a case that they should have made it in the tourney after all. While beating Utah and Cleveland State wasn't the toughest route, the sweet 16 is the sweet 16. And as a man of integrity, I will say that I was wrong about Arizona. However, I absolutely stand by <a href="http://theworldsombudsman.blogspot.com/2009/03/college-sports-ombudsman-unprecedented.html">my argument</a> as a whole - and also happily note that Maryland, Wisconsin and Michigan failed to make any sort of run in the tourney. That, combined with my picking 14 of the Sweet 16, makes me both a man of integrity and a man who is almost always correct. It feels good. It feels really good.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2) Syracuse.</span> I am rooting for Syracuse purely to extend the enjoyment of watching Syracuse girls, classes 2001-2008, go berserk all over Murray Hill. It is difficult to reconcile this with my rooting against Eric Devendorf, his unacceptable oncourt <a href="http://rockthewristband.files.wordpress.com/2008/12/devendorf.jpg">posturing</a> and his equally unacceptable offcourt <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1CgVsbhue-g">blaccent</a>. If I wrote a movie about Syracuse basketball, Devendorf would be played by <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIHNinYj-ro">Justin Timberlake</a> and <a href="http://media.collegepublisher.com/media/paper522/stills/0827580f.jpg">Johnny Flynn</a> would be played by <a href="http://www.thaformula.com/Formula%20Pictures/phife_return.jpg">Fife Dawg</a> from A Tribe Called Quest. And Fife Dawg would constantly beat up Justin Timberlake.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">3) The Buffalo Wild Wings Commercial.</span> Absurd. Unfortunately I can't find the basketball version of the commercial on the internet, but here is a <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1C8y5z_7YtA">football version</a> from the fall, with essentially the same theme. The basketball version will be shown 1000 times each game for the rest of the NCAA tourney, so you can't miss it. The premise is that a bunch of fans - from New York and Boston - are watching a game together at a bar. They decide they are having so much fun that they ask the bartender to put the game into overtime. He sends a signal to a photographer on court who, by using an ultra powerful camera flash, prevents a Boston slam dunk that would have won the game. The fans are absolutely delighted!<br /><br />What are the problems? First, Boston and New York fans would never harmoniously be at the same bar, and second, there are at least 5 black people wearing Boston jerseys. This is 5 more black fans than actually root for Boston (or, as it is also known, the "Nation's Capital of Sneaky Racism"). Even Boston's black players don't root for Boston. For example, <a href="http://www.nba.com/media/celtics/rondo_thumb350500.jpg">Rajon Rondo</a> and <a href="http://highbridnation.com/wordpress/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/kevin-garnett22.jpg">Kevin Garnett</a> play to win for the Celtics when they're on the court, but as soon as they're back on the bench <a href="http://a.espncdn.com/i/mag/2008issues/060208/simmons.jpg">they heckle</a> their teammates and revert to their default mode of hating the Celtics, Patriots, Red Sox, Bruins and <a href="http://www.revolutionsoccer.net/">Revolution</a>. Even the Revolution? Especially the Revolution. Third, the fans - for both sides - cheer wildly when the game is sent into overtime. Boston fans celebrating - thanking their lucky stars - that a <a href="http://www.time.com/time/2003/worldseries/moments/4.html">Bill Buckner moment</a> happened. Well, yeah, there may be years of agony later....but at least for now we get to enjoy an extra 45 minutes of Crispy Southwest Dippers and Huckleberry Lemonade!<br /><br />And I think thats the reason why this seemingly innocuous ad has had such a <a href="http://iheartceltics.blogspot.com/2009/03/buffalo-wild-wings-commercial-makes-me.html">strong</a> <a href="http://www.rushingtojudgment.com/articles/blog/the-buffalo-wild-wings-commercial-has-me-irked.html">reaction</a>. Real fans, while their favorite teams are playing, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AZVuRG4yCJI">are stressed out, sweating, gut-wrenched and at times possibly miserable</a>. I worked with an English woman who was actually incapable of watching England's soccer team play. She was so nervous that she had to sit outside and have people tell her what was happening. Real fans don't like and have nothing in common with the happy-go-lucky, wide-eyed <a href="http://www.buffalowildwings.com/">Buffalo Wild Wings</a> people, who are just thrilled to be at a chain restaurant socializing and high-fiving each other no matter who wins or loses.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">4) The Announcing.</span> Fantastic. <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZcglOItcKoM">Gus Johnson</a> and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yPDSCzpgJec">Bill Raftery</a> do a great job calling their respective games and capturing the excitement and emotion of the tournament (see also <a href="http://gusjohnsonswhisper.blogspot.com/">Gus Johnson's Whisper</a>). One of TWO's least favorite things is the understated play-by-play man. In the 1980s and early 90s, this role was filled by Pat Summerall - here's Summerall <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AW8aXD9I300">calling the final play</a> of the 1987 NFC Championship Game. While I liked Summerall generally, he just struggled at capturing the emotion of a big play.<br /><br />The current understated play-by-play man is Joe Buck, who is even worse because he's boring and smug at the same time, as if he's bigger than the moment and too cool to be excited. Here is Joe Buck calling arguably <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G-aKfTK2LiM">the greatest play</a> in Super Bowl history. Transcribed: "Pressure from Thomas off the edge...Eli Manning stays on his feet...airs it out down the field...it is caught by Tyree."<br /><br />Lets compare that to Gus Johnson calling <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgeqrYxu_YM">the end of a college basketball game</a> from a couple years back. Transcribed: "Throws it down court!!! Batista wiTH THE CAAAAAAATCHSDXL&HGR2&HHHGGHX!!!!!!!! AND THAAAAATS ITTTTTTTT!!!!!!!!! WHAAAAT A COMEBAAAACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"<br /><br />Can you imagine if Gus had called that Super Bowl play? He would have literally been screaming in tongues, bitten the ear off of the color guy and ransacked the booth. The transcript would have been entirely in wingdings.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">5) Prediction.</span> Villanova over Duke. Because I'd love it.<br /><br />In conclusion, Huckleberry Lemonade sounds delicious.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-33204803330967768792009-03-18T13:01:00.000-07:002009-03-19T07:56:00.054-07:00Manhattan Ombudsman: Aspiring Europeans<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsUsUiVtK5KhoZAYNMrUmVpw2RUuoKbPPWVfsqBKUqsy_RNYw7jPH-IQ5O4vKyQPlA5eD4qGlC_bvEmdnIekXutR6am7FtwuECsjCuKBTN2epJPXiVzCbA_Y_KdjZypSF5nk3iftqPIh33/s1600-h/euros+in+ny.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhsUsUiVtK5KhoZAYNMrUmVpw2RUuoKbPPWVfsqBKUqsy_RNYw7jPH-IQ5O4vKyQPlA5eD4qGlC_bvEmdnIekXutR6am7FtwuECsjCuKBTN2epJPXiVzCbA_Y_KdjZypSF5nk3iftqPIh33/s320/euros+in+ny.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5314890865266572370" border="0" /></a><br />Many of you may have come across <a href="http://www.nytimes.com/2009/03/15/nyregion/thecity/15part.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1">this</a> New York Times article about the Bagatelle and Merkato 55 brunches.<br /><br />While there are many troubling aspects to this article, TWO will not, at present, solve the economic crisis subplot bubbling beneath the surface of this story. I will instead solve another problem that has been plaguing a certain subsection of New Yorkers, highlighted by the quote below:<br /><br />"In addition, Mr. Laba said, the typical Bagatelle customer has a cultural affinity with this sort of rosé-soaked afternoon reveling. For the most part, the customers are what he described as “European friendly,” meaning they either are European or aspire to be."<br /><br />There are two important groups here which TWO feels must be addressed: The Europeans who want to be <span style="font-style: italic;">Europeans</span> and the Americans who want to be <span style="font-style: italic;">Europeans</span>.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">1) "</span><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Europeans</span><span style="font-weight: bold;">"</span>. While TWO is friends with a number of Europeans, they are not "<span style="font-style: italic;">Europeans</span>." Europeans in New York are normal people who come from a different country and are trying to broaden their horizons by building a life for themselves in a new city. They make American friends and appreciate (or in some instances tolerate) the differences they find in American culture. <span style="font-style: italic;">Europeans</span>, by contrast, come to New York to specialize in being European. Its difficult to really stand out being European in Europe, so why not come to New York where you can really shine!<br /><br />Are you a European living in New York, but want to be a <span style="font-style: italic;">European</span> living in New York? The steps are simple:<br /><br />a) Show up at <a href="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3167/2682557368_29c561093d.jpg">Cafe Gitane</a> in skinny jeans at 10:30 AM, drink coffee and glare at people as they walk by.<br /><br />b) Later, go to brunch at <a href="http://nymag.com/listings/restaurant/le-bilboquet/">Le Bilboquet</a>, <a href="http://guestofaguest.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/bagatelle_aymeric_clemente.jpg">Bagatelle</a> or <a href="http://guestofaguest.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/12/merkato_55_4_500pix.jpg">Merkato 55</a> and when you meet American girls, always kiss them on both cheeks. Should they hesitate, hold out their hand, or kiss you on just one cheek, act befuddled and explain "Two kiss," even if that's not really your cultural habit.<br /><br />c) No matter how familiar you've become with American names, do not pronounce any American name correctly. And never use the "j" sound, even if you're British, where the "j" sound is a staple of your phonetic alphabet.<br /><br />d) Always introduce yourself and your friends to people by your full name in the strongest accent possible: "Bonjour Yulia. Oui, I am called Jean-Pierre Emile, and this is Danilo Lukanelli, and this his friend from Marbella called Sebastian Del Pueblo de Nuestra Señora la Reina de los Ángeles de la Porciúncula Torres.....No no no...two kiss."<br /><br />e) Show up buzzed to <a href="http://martineandme.com/CafeNoir2.jpg">Cafe Noir</a> or <a href="http://felixnyc.com/bistro/index.php">Felix</a> and speak loudly in your native tongue so other people hear you. Break into English only to criticize the wine selection or talk about vague connections you have to owners of exclusive night spots.<br /><br />f) Have a late dinner at <a href="http://www.nypost.com/pagesixmag/issues/20080727/images/features/cipriani/1.jpg">Cipriani Downtown</a> wearing a <a href="http://www.suitsmen.co.uk/suit-images/zoom/brook-taverner-esher-summer-jacket-1.jpg">light colored blazer</a>.... if you are really <span style="font-style: italic;">European</span> you can get the seats out front and it is imperative that you face the street. Ideally, no one in your party will be sitting on the other side of the table. You will stare at people as they walk by and smoke as much as possible.<br /><br />g) End the night at <a href="http://revenuerobot.com/art/gold01.jpg">Gold Bar</a>. If you aren't that <span style="font-style: italic;">European</span> yet, go to <a href="http://www.cieloclub.com/">Cielo</a> and loudly tell everyone how a friend of a friend of yours partied with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O666kGBEvF0">DJ Tiesto</a> in Copenhagen.<br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">2) Aspiring </span><span style="font-style: italic; font-weight: bold;">Europeans</span><span style="font-weight: bold;">.</span> Are you a boring American who would feel a bit more interesting if there was just some way you could transfer to another culture? If so, read on. If not - the people reading on would never date you.<br /><br />Unlike when you transferred from a NESCAC school to NYU, cultural transfers are not as easy. Your one year abroad at a European satellite NYU campus, during which you only made friends with Americans (unless you count hooking up with your foreign language practice partner), didn't quite give you that special Euro edge you're looking for. But follow the below easy steps, and TWO will join you one afternoon in a few months to drink <a href="http://img.timeinc.net/recipes/i/recipes/su/07/08/pimms-cup-su-1646369-l.jpg">pimms</a> and celebrate your new culture!<br /><br />a) This is the most important step. Develop a nebulous, indefinable Pan-European accent. If you are nervous and think you could never take yourself seriously faking an accent, use this as motivation: here's a girl from Detroit, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wsm2I0vfKR8">before</a> and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SkDvFA6mVWs">after</a>. Its not that hard - listen to people speak, and change some long vowel sounds to short vowel sounds, and some short vowel sounds to long vowel sounds - and then be willing to put in the practice time. Here's a young man named Antonio who worked hard on his Pan-European accent and went from <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IzGV7RzuIC4">this</a> to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4LgTKmRkLuM">this</a>. Wow!<br /><br />As a sidebar, for some imponderable reason, if you're a girl who grew up on the Upper East Side, or even wish that you did, you may have already developed this accent. TWO will be in a cab with a girl who grew up on 69th & 3rd, and she'll be saying something like "I've naught bin recently? but attentet the soft opening..." and I'll say "Are you European? You have a slight trace of an accent" and she'll feign surprise, like no one's ever said that before, and respond "No, I grew up in Manhattan" and then think contentedly to herself "I'm just that m****f***ing worldly."<br /><br />b) Propound broad theories and critiques on American culture. "Americans' hospitality is not genuine, you know? They say 'Have a nice day!' or 'You look beautiful' or 'You look spectacular in your Alexander Wang <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZUP57D8Yg-jFcQoYKyuQQWniGN44SnUn17K_TqNNo9BFyJktL-KeqW4_DO69ostj62nkVUeRb1VGSBTffUtRrxWtXLTQNqP-XRmkfJ8JggCoCHNGqqSpGOP26P7mNDE1s4PY-HMFke1ev/s400/Fall+09+Alexander+Wang+-+1.jpg">sequined tights</a> even though its day time!' but they don't really care. Its just so different abroad."<br /><br />c) Follow the above Europeans becoming <span style="font-style: italic;">European</span> steps 1)(a) - (g) as closely as you can. While you can't pretend not to know how to make the sound "j" or correctly pronounce the name "Rebecca" you can counterbalance that by ending every conversation with "Ciao" in your Pan-European accent. If you can't get into Gold Bar or Cielo, go to <a href="http://nymag.com/listings/bar/baraonda00/">Baraonda</a> on Sunday nights and tell people you did anyway.<br /><br />Good luck, I hope to see you surrounded by <span style="font-style: italic;">Europeans</span> at Merkato 55 soon!<br /><br />In conclusion, TWO speaks in a fake accent on all first dates. Ciao bella.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-43580369022815890702009-03-16T12:52:00.000-07:002009-03-16T16:23:08.141-07:00College Sports Ombudsman: Unprecedented State<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOvOt4TKPV-5KzidNTOauH9JmeSsnnwSZrG3h3zyTbWHG4dHuwhWOaNN8lkg-UpXtWbdT_EJk2q99P6HgECFim1frT_od2B4e-qYENYDi8sv8zRTmwzc4LWhiFNCHICpS1KPNjqTakwE8b/s1600-h/stmaryx.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 10px 10px 0pt; float: left; cursor: pointer; width: 245px; height: 305px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOvOt4TKPV-5KzidNTOauH9JmeSsnnwSZrG3h3zyTbWHG4dHuwhWOaNN8lkg-UpXtWbdT_EJk2q99P6HgECFim1frT_od2B4e-qYENYDi8sv8zRTmwzc4LWhiFNCHICpS1KPNjqTakwE8b/s320/stmaryx.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5313929349906810994" border="0" /></a><br />Yesterday evening the <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3375352">NCAA basketball tournament brackets were announced</a>. After it was over, TWO fully expected football BCS chairman John Swofford, wild-eyed and disoriented, to burst on to CBS's set and proclaim "this is an unprecedented <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/news/story?id=3375352">state of health!!!</a>" before being beaten into submission by Seth Davis and Greg Gumbel, the latter at times <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5D5oKEVqQJg">using his shoe</a>, before security could remove Swofford from the studio.<br /><br />While the NCAA tournament is in a far better state of health than the football's BCS circus, yesterdays selections indicate that the same large school/large conference bias is present in both. In short, the bias can be summed up as the following: nearly every school in a big conference is better than even the best schools in the midmajors.<br /><br />TWO submits the following: evidence shows that over the past 4 or 5 years, mid-majors have consistently out-performed comparably ranked BCS bubble teams and mid-majors have out-performed their own seeds. Because of that, not only should more midmajors receive bids, but their seeds should be higher.<br /><br />Much of the problem has to do with the self-fulfilling nature of the selections. When mid-major teams are selected, they are frequently (and sometimes correctly) seeded 16-12. These mid-majors are thus playing the top teams in the country, teams that have already proven they are better than their intra-conference BCS bubble teams. Meanwhile, BCS bubbleteams, if they receive bids, are typically given the 7-10 seeds, meaning that they have a much better chance of winning those early round games, as the competition is not as tough.<br /><br />So lets compare like things and look at how mid-majors have done against BCS schools in the 10 vs 7 and 8 vs 9 games <a href="http://online.wsj.com/article/SB123540154929947981.html">historically</a>.... unsurprisingly to TWO, the record is even... 18-18. Further, since 2004 10 mid-majors seeded 7th or higher have reached the Sweet 16, while only 4 BCS schools have gone that far.<br /><br />What does that tell you? Quite simply, midmajor bubbleteams are frequently undervalued. The root of the problem is the selection committee's handling of information. Each year they are asked: Do we pick A) a BCS team on which we have plenty of information and that has proven beyond a doubt that they are clearly <span style="font-style: italic;">not</span> a top team, or do we pick B) a mid-major team that we don't know as much about, has a great record and could be a flop <span style="font-style: italic;">or</span> could make an <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Drr10nbhx1E">incredible</a> and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FADAN3Bznwg">exciting</a> Cinderella <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mn0n79N2oJ4">run</a> that <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DBFFJb9KSdc">captures</a> the <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGHQ6xpnahI">imagination</a> and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=20rX0cg0i2E">hopes</a> of a nation? Year after year, the selection committee picks choice A. And the fact that 10 mid-majors have made the sweet 16 after being seeded 7-10 (compared to only 4 BCS bubble teams) shows you that year after year, it is the mid majors who are undervalued and the BCS teams that <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cDAq5tyfk9E">are who we thought they were</a>.<br /><br />I won't go overboard with historical analyses - but a look at the final NCAA polls in recent seasons is helpful for establishing that every year several midmajors outperform their seeds... in 2008, Davidson (9th), Butler (14th), Western Kentucky (22nd) and Drake (23rd) finished in the top 25, meaning that, in retrospect, each deserved to be a high seed. Their actual seeds? 10th, 7th, 12th, and 5th, respectively. In 2007 there was Southern Illinois (final ranking 14, seeded 4), Nevada (15, 7), Butler (21, 5), Winthrop (22, 11) and BYU (24, 8). And 2006 saw George Mason (6, 11) George Washington (19, 8) Wichita State (21, 7), Bradley (24, 13) and Bucknell (25, 9). You have to wonder, first, what could these teams have done if they were seeded more accurately in the first place and second, what could the next best team in their conference have done if they had been given an at-large bid?<br /><br />So armed with this body of information, this body of facts regarding midmajors' regular and consistent performances which tend to indicate that they should be given more and higher bids...now that we have this...lets look at what the selection committee has done in 2009.<br /><br />We DON'T have St. Mary's, which went 26-6 (including 4 losses while their star player, since returned, was out), but we DO have 20-13 Maryland, which went 7-9 in conference including a <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb/recap?gameId=290240150">loss to Duke</a> by 127 points in January that was so brutal that <a href="http://www.baltimoresun.com/media/photo/2008-02/36200969.jpg">Greivis Vasquez</a> set his hair on fire at midcourt and coach Gary Williams wept, nude, on his office couch for two days afterwards.<br /><br />We DON'T have Creighton, which went 26-7 and won its regular season conference, but we DO have Arizona, which went 19-13 and finished 6th in the Pac-10. I'm not sure if my favorite part of Arizona's resume' is their <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/ncb/recap?gameId=283230012">loss</a> to UAB or that they've lost 5 of their last 6 games - but either way, I can't wait for their Cinderella run.<br /><br />We DON'T have Davidson, which went 26-7 (including a win over current 6 seed West Virginia and close losses to Duke and Oklahoma - both 2 seeds) and won its regular season conference championship, but we DO get 19-12 Wisconsin, which managed to not win a single game against a ranked opponent but did have a player on the roster named <a href="http://www.uwbadgers.com/sport_news/mbb/bios/bio.html?athid=6969&deptid=116">Wquinton</a>. The best part is that its pronounced "Quinton". The family loves the letter W but hates <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Amwq43-lrM">Wynton Marsalis</a>. There was only one solution.<br /><br />And we could go on - what about at-large bids for Vermont, VMI, College of Charleston, Arkansas-Little Rock, San Diego State and Niagara? I'm not saying that these teams ALL should have received bids, but the fact that they weren't even in the discussion shows that there is a problem.<br /><br />When the selection committee finally stumbled out of its meeting room, the smoke cleared, the dust settled, the strippers went home, and the young Thai boys hid in the cupboard, of the 34 at large bids, <a href="http://www.usatoday.com/sports/college/mensbasketball/tourney09/2009-03-15-whos-out_N.htm">thirty</a> (30) went to BCS bubble teams. Somewhere, John Swofford was wondering why Xavier got a bid.<br /><br />In conclusion, I last won an NCAA pool in 2000. Thank you <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lkh8XXzzQE8">Mateen Cleaves</a>.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-59769268379870009002009-03-09T14:17:00.000-07:002009-03-16T16:29:15.013-07:00Politics Ombudsman: Income Gaps and Society Safe ZoneWhats the problem?<br /><br />TWO tries not to go overboard into political arenas, however one theme thats been repeated in articles and on television news has moved me to comment. <a href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/03/06/AR2009030603367.html">This Washington Post article</a>, discussing President Obama's tax plan, contains the following statement: "Few analysts dispute the notion that the gap between rich and poor has widened to a troubling degree over the past three decades."<br /><br />This sort of "troubled by the income gap" statement is something that has, somehow, entered a "safe zone" that society saves for things that are totally beyond reproach... like telling people that <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JFWPeVfWB9o">U2</a> is your favorite band, admitting to drinking <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQKdEdzHnfU">Starbucks</a> and saying that you loved <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u8PxG5zvgOM">Heath Ledger's performance</a> in Dark Knight - these are safe, safe statements. No one will question any of this, because its in the Society Safe Zone. You can know nothing about economics or politics, but if you say "you know, the gap between the rich and the poor is just getting too large" and then vaguely mention something about "economic injustice" everyone will nod their head.<br /><br />Whats wrong with a little income gap?<br /><br />An <a href="http://www.census.gov/hhes/www/income/histinc/rdi3.html">income gap</a> is a direct consequence of living in a capitalist society. Picture a graph with income on the y access, and people in order of wealth across the x access. In a perfectly communal society, there is a horizontal line running across the graph - because there is no wealth differential for anyone. In any capitalist society, there will be an upward sloping line to some extent, rewarding those who, through hard work, luck, or a combination or both, create more value for themselves (and arguably for society as a whole). So the question is, how steep should that line be?<br /><br />The truth is, no one knows. To be certain, you don't want all capital in the hands of a very few. On the other, you don't want to provide disincentives for innovation and success. While the matter can be debated, there is no evidence that the income gap is now "troubling" whereas 30 years ago, it was "fine."<br /><br />TWO would also argue that income gap is not an overly meaningful statistic, short of the extreme examples mentioned above. A far more relevant measure of the strength of the economy is income relative to an indexed cost of living. Consider a situation where in year X, the cost of living for the poorest half of the country is $1. The poorest half of the country makes $1 per capita, and thus is just making enough money to survive. The richest half of the country makes $10 per capita, more easily affording and surpassing the cost of living. In year Y, the cost of living stays at $1, but the poorest half of the country is now making $5 per capita. The richest half of the country is now making $100 per capita. The income gap has increased in year Y as compared to year X, but the poorer half of the country is far better situated in year Y, earning 5 times more than the hypothetical $1 cost of living.<br /><br />The fact is, the percentage of people below the poverty line has <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Poverty_59_to_05.png">generally fallen</a> over the last 20 years, prior to the current meltdown. During that same period, the poorest 3/5s of the country's per capita income has <a href="http://www.census.gov/hhes/www/income/histinc/h01AR.html">increased</a> anywhere from $2k to $6k in real dollars ($10k to $30k in nominal dollars). While cost of living is inherently hard to measure, the poverty figures mentioned above would seem to suggest that adjusted rents and food baskets have not increased more than the adjusted incomes.<br /><br />If anyone's wondering what I've done here, its that I've just <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQezXbiroiE">dropped knowledge right in all of your eye pieces</a>.<br /><br />Times are tough - TWO thinks people should be asking the right questions and the government should be taking steps to actually help people and the economy in the long run. If the wealth distribution is not ideal, then TWO is all for taking sane steps to adjust it, but it is an issue that should be debated and researched. TWO is not, meanwhile, in favor of using buzz phrases and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bdprv6iwCSA">Robin Hood</a> talk that distracts from the actual problems at hand.<br /><br />In conclusion, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SWksEJQEYVU">Jim Cramer</a> supports TWO as Fed Chairman.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-53964558668430898272009-03-02T12:58:00.000-08:002009-03-02T19:16:18.420-08:00NBA Ombudsman: Loyalty and StyleChanging outfits.<br /><br />In a recent ESPN column, Len Pasquarelli <a href="http://www.forbes.com/forbes/2009/0302/050_new_ballgame.html">correctly avers</a> that fan loyalty in the NFL is eroded by rampant free agency. And while free agency is a problem in football, the NFL has taken steps to limit its effects and maintain continuity in other ways. The primary way the NFL does this is by keeping uniforms, colors and logos constant. NFL teams can only adjust their uniforms every 5 years, and typically uniform changes are minor. For example, among teams existing in the same city for each of the last 20 years, only the Patriots (<a href="http://assets.espn.go.com/photo/2008/0121/nfl_u_eason_580.jpg">before</a> and <a href="http://www.yoursportsmemorabilia.com/shop/images/TomBrady082407.jpg">after</a>), Broncos (<a href="http://www.sportsrundown.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/john_elway.jpg">before</a> and <a href="http://www.nfl4all.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/john-elway1.jpg">after</a>), Falcons (<a href="http://cache.gettyimages.com/xc/247825.jpg?v=1&c=ViewImages&k=2&d=17A4AD9FDB9CF1934A2752006EF5F0ED24871AD4A8864214284831B75F48EF45">before</a> and <a href="http://thestartingfive.files.wordpress.com/2007/11/michael_vick.jpg">after</a>) and Buccaneers (<a href="http://www.joebucsfan.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/dougwilliams.jpg">before</a> and <a href="http://www.buccaneers.com/media/photos/misc/070825_june10.jpg">after</a>) instituted major changes to their uniforms and logos, and all except the Bucs maintained the same team colors. During that time period, 3 teams (ignoring the Cleveland-Baltimore situation) changed cities - the Raiders moved from Los Angeles to Oakland and kept their uniforms the <a href="http://www.tristarproductions.com/Sales/Images/Football/Jackson-Raiders-16x20.jpg">same</a>, the Rams moved from <a href="http://www.ramsusa.com/ed2.jpg">Los Angeles</a> to <a href="http://www.maxwellfootballclub.org/content/awards/bell/2001/FAULK_action.jpg">St. Louis</a> and maintained the same logo and essentially the same colors and the <a href="http://www.freewebs.com/cregan32/Warren%20Moon.jpg">Houston Oilers</a> becamse the <a href="http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2008/09/16-22/vince-young-titans-missing-police-suicide-watch-collins.jpg">Tennessee Titans</a>, changing the logo but maintaing the same color scheme. Continuity of team colors and uniforms may seem minor, but I believe it explains a lot about fan loyalty in a time when players can move from team to team very quickly.<br /><br />It is also interesting to juxtapose this against the fly-by-night circus act that has become the NBA. In addition to the much worse free agency problem the NBA has (just <a href="http://sports.espn.go.com/nba/news/story?page=FreeAgents-09-10">look</a> at the number of top players that will likely change cities in the next 2 years), the teams change their outfits like an 19 year old sorority girl whose jeans don't fit before the PiKa - Delta Gamma Tailgate. Literally the only difference is that <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BCvXzjGRnKc">lip gloss</a> is not as much of an issue to the NBA players...or <a href="http://www.missionskincare.com/product/lip-protector-spf-20.html">is it</a>?<br /><br />In the last 20 years, the only teams to NOT have had major changes to their uniforms are the Knicks, Celtics, Bulls, Spurs, Clippers and Lakers. For the other teams, it has been a total free for all. The worst offenders?<br /><br />The Cavs used to have perfectly <a href="http://d.imagehost.org/0047/Cavaliers_1987_Corbin_front.jpg">normal uniforms</a> in the late 80s and early 90s, with instantly recognizeable orange and blue colors. Then, in 1995, they suddenly started wearing <a href="http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2007/images/08/27/p1_kemp.jpg">this</a>. One day, someone said - why not start wearing maroon and gold? So now they <a href="http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/PHO/bk_AAHP113_8x10%7ELebron-James-Posters.jpg">do</a>! But also sometimes they'll wear <a href="http://www.midwestsportsfans.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/lebron-james-dunk1.jpeg">blue</a>. Whatever - no rules!<br /><br />The Nuggets had my favorite <a href="http://www.sports-logos-screensavers.com/user/Denver_Nuggets_Old_Logo.jpg">logo</a> and <a href="http://imagecache2.allposters.com/images/pic/PHO/bk_AAHX089_8x10%7EAlex-English-Posters.jpg">uniform design</a> of any team in the NBA, and maybe in all of professional sports. But why stick with unique and well liked when you can have <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhhvQGBUxeMRbqdSpL6gpEAVRWsBiuW7H61iP9p6_xlhobBfCfZ47xfMuVtJK67AfPH-qRpYryYSzmgKEZqMAegDrgg5GL2AAsqlbM_1gKjsssckzNd7I3imTzh8iNNonydlJXlChnSfKBl/s320/laphonso.jpg">plain</a> and <a href="http://www.sports-gallery.com/images/mcdyessautophoto.jpg">uninspiring</a>? Then, a few years later, a marketing person thought - Now lets confound everyone with a totally new <a href="http://www.all-nba-all-basketball.com/images/DENVER_NUGGETS_LOGO1.jpg">logo</a> and <a href="http://www.nbagauntlet.com/wp-content/uploads/p1anthony.jpg">color scheme</a>! In 2010, the Nuggets will be unveiling their new logo - a small, very small <a href="http://www.jakartajavakini.com/media/img_wo_doraemon_jan2006.jpg">asian cat</a> named Nugget. The colors will change daily, but the players will all be asked to have <a href="http://www.animetv.ws/images/AnimeTV-Naruto.jpg">crazy hair</a>.<br /><br />The Rockets. Again, at one point the Rockets had a very recognizeable <a href="http://zizzostats.com/rockets88-95.gif">logo</a> and <a href="http://i2.cdn.turner.com/si/2008/writers/jack_mccallum/04/07/hof.reaction/p1.hof.jpg">colorscheme</a> with red, white and yellow trim. In the mid 90s, the Rockets thought, why not just do blue? Notwithstanding the Pistons, Mavericks, Warriors, Timberwolves, Nuggets, Magic, Pacers, Knicks and Nets, there's just not enough teams with blue. Lets also throw in pinstripes. And boom....<a href="http://www.hollywoodcollectibles.com/autographed/memorabilia/sports/collectibles/authentic/Basketball/8x10%20Photos/Charles_Barkley_Auto_Photo5_md.jpg">there it is</a>... the first ever NBA uniform doubling as <a href="http://www.main.com/%7Eanns/other/rockets/barkley.jpg">summertime pajamas</a>. Drop the microphone and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoS8j9eNMZU">walk off the stage</a>. But now come back on the stage, and throw out <a href="http://www.pack95seabrook.com/images/Houston_Rockets%5B1%5D.gif">this logo</a>, which could have easily originally been pushed as the logo for Raw, a now defunct MMA clothing line. Look, the <a href="http://www.visithoustontexas.org/images/yao-ming-houston-rockets.jpg">new uniforms</a> are an improvement, but how long will it last? How amazing would it be if the new mascot of the Rockets was <a href="http://www.moonbattery.com/elton-john.jpg">Elton John</a> and he designed different <a href="http://mattdavisopenshismouth.com/wp-content/uploads/elton_john.jpg">uniforms</a> every night. He would play <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ubeMeOJFjFg">Rocketman</a> before each game and then sit on the bench with the team, delivering water and towels to perspiring players while unnerving everyone in the process. Just an idea.<br /><br />I could go on like this about the Hawks, Bucks, Warriors, Suns and a number of other teams as well. The bottom line is, when the players are all different, the colors change, and the logo keeps getting updated, what is it fans are rooting for? Their city? Themselves?<br /><br />In conclusion, I was a dominant 8th grade basketball player.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-75582503466999147742009-02-23T15:38:00.000-08:002009-02-24T12:49:09.925-08:00Art Ombudsman: The Fakeness<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgV5IDQM9Ut_3Pl7oLWLgnfZBX5ApEDk5Nx2KEXM1XnLmVK3P4VmSf28XAN5ICvJjD2Ih-fnlanfF1VcykVYHz6dRqYC-t7ypDrF7m5YR9exk9CwXsdF9dsauz6vGOhk3mDpg2aWVeqr83E/s1600-h/jacksiegel090223_slideshowbttn_560.jpg"><img style="margin: 0pt 0pt 10px 10px; float: right; cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 212px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgV5IDQM9Ut_3Pl7oLWLgnfZBX5ApEDk5Nx2KEXM1XnLmVK3P4VmSf28XAN5ICvJjD2Ih-fnlanfF1VcykVYHz6dRqYC-t7ypDrF7m5YR9exk9CwXsdF9dsauz6vGOhk3mDpg2aWVeqr83E/s320/jacksiegel090223_slideshowbttn_560.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5306193621941540786" border="0" /></a><br />Sometimes it isn't art.<br /><br />Last night's Oscars got TWO thinking... Who decides what's art - or, more precisely, good art? The Oscars are decided by people with in the industry, and so it risks a disconnect with the people, educated or not, who are outside of it. BUT...since TWO's favorite movie, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AIzbwV7on6Q">Slumdog Millionaire</a>, won 8 awards, this won't be a commentary on the Oscars.<br /><br />But it will be a commentary on something else purported to be art and the validation of the same. New York Magazine recently gave us a <a href="http://nymag.com/fashion/09/spring/54325/">page</a> on these people. The article title is quite accurate "I Go Out. I See Friends. I Take Pictures. I Post Them." The sub-heading is more questionable: "Their art is the party. Their gallery is the Internet. Four young photographers who live behind the lens."<br /><br />Is this art?<br /><br />TWO will not attempt to provide an all encompassing definition of art, but will be satiated if, taken as a whole, the pictures on the above sites are creative and could reasonably promote an intelligent dialogue regarding their content and meaning. All four of the sites mentioned, <a href="http://hanuk.com/">hanuk</a>, <a href="http://hobogestapo.com/">hobogestapo</a>, <a href="http://www.theskullset.com/">theskullset</a> and <a href="http://www.nickydigital.com/">nickydigital</a> are similar in that they go to exclusive hipster night spots and take pictures. It should be noted that of the 20 pictures highlighted specifically by the article, 4 are taken at Beatrice Inn. For those who don't know, Beatrice is to hipsters what <a href="http://www.barmartignetti.com/">Bar Martignetti</a> is to people who wear nantucket red pants and <a href="http://www.ckbradley.com/">CK Bradley</a> belts. That is, it is the damn Super Bowl of their genre....Beatrice is where the hipsters are at their hipsterest. Every day a hipster isn't at Beatrice is a day he's thinking about his next Beatrice outing...is this painter's hat funny, or is it a cliche now? Maybe I'll ironically wear a tie. Are my children's sunglasses clever, or is that a cliche too? Is it ever too warm to wear a scarf? The Bar Martinetti types are the same way...only different. What pastels are appropriate in the winter? Should I wear my shirt tucked in or especially tucked in? Where are the socks I wear with my ferragamo loafershahahajust kidding I never wear socks with my 'gamos. Incidentally, in 2005, a crew of Trinity College alums on their way to Martignetti stumbled across a band of NYU alums going to Beatrice....the <a href="http://www.break.com/usercontent/2007/3/Russian-Riot-247444.html">horrible brawl</a> that ensued was so intense that a mini big-bang occurred, resulting in both the creation of skinny jeans and an instantaneous joint <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=INgXzChwipY">Morrissey</a> - <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtkBhSRTe78">O.A.R.</a> shared stage concert, baffling and sedating all combatants. True story.<br /><br />Anyway, back to the point. Look at the four websites....do you see art...or do you see party pictures? TWO sees the latter. While Hobo Gestappo says that they "don't just toss anything up" on the site, a look at the content would suggest otherwise. While there may be individual pictures that have some artistic merit, I think it is improper to judge those outside the context of the full body of work. The fact is, one out of a hundred pictures anyone takes might have some artisitic value, just by luck. A UGA sorority girl, taking pictures at her TriDelt - SAE Crush Night 2009 Party on Broad Street might take one picture where the lighting, shadows, positioning and facial expressions are absolutely striking. That doesn't mean that she can hand me the stack of 100 photos from that night, mostly depicting her friends sweating and holding dixie cups, and say "Here's the art."<br /><br />Fake art?<br /><br />TWO contends above that the content of the four above sites is party pictures...essentially indistinguishable from that which you'd find on <a href="http://www.njguido.com/">New Jersey Guido</a>, <a href="http://www.chicago-scene.com/photo.htm">Chicago Scene</a>, <a href="http://www.patrickmcmullan.com/site/index.aspx">Patrick McMullan</a> or <a href="http://www.lastnightsparty.com/">Last Night's Party</a>. What is distinguishable? The people. The unspoken message in this New York Magazine piece is that these pictures have artistic value because their subjects are fashion forward, artistically advanced people...and the pictures on New Jersey Guido have no value, because the pictures are of guidos. Who makes this call? Well, the fashion market editor of New York Magazine, who likely knows these photographers already from hanging out at Beatrice. It is a classic example of a niche group validating itself...if you are accepted into the world of New York's artists and hipsters, anything you do is art. The circularity is clear... Jack Siegel is an artist because his party pictures are art...and his party pictures are art because he's an artist.<br /><br />To tie this together, I don't believe that the body of work is sufficiently creative nor dialogue inducing to justify the classification as art. TWO's body of work, however, clearly is. I would also challenge any of these photographers to a Madden 2003 game on my Playstation 2. Just saying.<br /><br />In conclusion, I once played a crazy game of poker.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-68154837697762460492009-02-17T12:15:00.000-08:002009-02-18T16:19:24.358-08:00CSPAN Ombudsman: Ranking Presidents, RoxetteWho's the best?<br /><br />In response to overwhelming public demand, CSPAN got 65 historians to take time off from their schedules to let Americans know which Presidents <a href="http://www.c-span.org/PresidentialSurvey/Overall-Ranking.aspx">have been the best</a>. A <a href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090215/ap_on_go_pr_wh/ranking_presidents">helpful article</a> accompanies this with the breaking news that Lincoln is the top rated President. See also <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/02/16/presidential.survey/index.html">http://www.cnn.com/2009/POLITICS/02/16/presidential.survey/index.html</a> .<br /><br />I realize that we have somehow developed into a ranking society, where every show on E! and VH1 is a countdown of some kind, but the idea that a) Americans need their Presidents ranked for them and b) these rankings are definitive in any way is absurd.<br /><br />As an indication of how silly this is, please read an actual excerpt: "....Bill Clinton j<span style="background: transparent none repeat scroll 0% 0%; cursor: pointer; -moz-background-clip: -moz-initial; -moz-background-origin: -moz-initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: -moz-initial;" class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1234727465_4"></span>umped six spots from No. 21 to 15. Other recent presidents moved positions as well: <span style="background: transparent none repeat scroll 0% 0%; cursor: pointer; -moz-background-clip: -moz-initial; -moz-background-origin: -moz-initial; -moz-background-inline-policy: -moz-initial;" class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1234727465_5">Ronald Reagan</span> advanced from No. 11 to 10, George H.W. Bush <span style="border-bottom: 1px dashed rgb(0, 102, 204); cursor: pointer;" class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1234727465_6"></span>from No. 20 to 18 and Jimmy Carter fell <span style="border-bottom: 1px dashed rgb(0, 102, 204); cursor: pointer;" class="yshortcuts" id="lw_1234727465_7"></span>from No. 22 to 25." Now read that again in <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyimL4zPrqI">Casey Kasem</a>'s voice, and replace Bill Clinton with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JDTAqsMNEM">Richard Marx</a>, Ronald Reagan with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FY2WxSNuU_8">Boy Meets Girl</a>, Bush with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Sxf6Xd75yUo">The Bangles</a> and Carter with <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_QGyLqQ2CI">Roxette</a>, and this could be a 1989 American Top 40 transcript. But why are these Presidents advancing and falling? Either they were good or they weren't, but their performances haven't changed. What has George Washington done to deserve being dropped in the rankings? The explanation that "Today's concerns shape our views of the past..." by one of the historians does more to discredit the rankings than explain them... to judge Thomas Jefferson's presidency in light of, for example, the 2009 financial crisis, is the height of anachronism and revisionist history.<br /><br />Second, and I won't go overboard in analysis here...but a couple of the rankings were very surprising. John F. Kennedy ranking 7th, ahead of Jefferson, Eisenhower, Wilson and Reagan is absurd. Kennedy was (tragically) only able to serve 3 years, and during that time did not have a particularly stellar record (see, eg <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u_QGyLqQ2CI">the Bay of Pigs Fiasco</a>). It is hard to defend his 3 year performance as exceeding that of so many well regarded two term presidents. Second, Jimmy Carter ranking 25th, essentially middle of the pack, is even more egregious. Jimmy Carter steered the country towards a period of high unemployment, low growth and dangerously high inflation. He received <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Gallup_Poll-Approval_Rating-Jimmy_Carter.png">epicly low approval ratings</a> and was internationally embarrassed by the <a href="http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/hi/picture_gallery/04/middle_east_iran_hostage_crisis/html/1.stm">Iran Hostage Crisis</a>. Carter managed to win only 6 states and the District of Columbia in his 1980 reelection bid. However, Carter was ranked ahead of people like Richard Nixon (who, while far from perfect, served two terms and was popular enough to win his reelection in one of the greatest landslides in American history), Zachary Taylor (who had an effective Presidency shortened by death) and James Garfield (who only served for four months and didn't have time to lead the nation into ruin, like Carter did).<br /><br />More importantly, I would like to announce that CSPAN will be teaming with VH1 to create the following jointly produced shows, to air on both networks:<br /><br />1) <span style="font-style: italic;">Top 10 Totally Unbelievable Invasions</span>. Hosted by Daisey Fuentes, historians rank various sneak attack military operations, from the fall of Troy to Quantrill's Raiders to Normandy as Michael Ian Black ("I mean, to the Germans, Eisenhower is like the anti-David Hasselhoff!!! And so is Omar Bradley!"), among others, provide commentary. Into and out of commercial breaks, the chorus to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcvHCKo8MRw">EMF's Unbelievable</a> plays as the show's title graphic appears. From the actual show transcript...Historian: "After Ghengis Khan's invasion of Volga Bulgaria, he set his sights on Hungary, after physically crushing Russian princes to death under his eating platform" Sinbad: "DAMN!"<br /><br />2) <span style="font-style: italic;">Top 30 Most Influential Christians</span>. With quick cuts and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EeOC8isIGro">Swizz Beatz tracks</a> playing in the background, CSPAN/VH1 counts down through St. Augustine, various Popes, St. Peter and others. Spoiler Alert! Jesus falls one spot to #2 as host Giuliana Rancic explains that, quite simply, Jesus' name recognition has been diluted by the sheer number of <a href="http://www.boxrec.com/search.php?status=all&cat=boxer&first_name=Jesus%25&last_name=&submit=Go">Mexican boxers of the same name</a> ("Dios Mio!" quips celebrity commenter George Lopez). Some Christian leaders attending a pre-screening have questioned Apostle Paul's #1 ranking, contending that Jesus is the central figure in their religion, but CSPAN/VH1 stands by its rating process.<br /><br />3) <span style="font-style: italic;">All Access: 20 Most Controversial Supreme Court Decisions</span>. Brooke Burke is all about controversy as she counts down an explosive list of court cases with comments from a star-studded group of celebrities. The list is comprehensive, from Plessy v. Ferguson ("That $#!* was %@#*@# up" - Ice T) to Roe v. Wade ("YEAH!" - Linda Perry) to, of course, Church of Lukumi Babalu Aye v. City of Hialeah ("That ordinance was neutral but was improperly motivated and thus had to be narrowly tailored to meet a compelling governmental interest!" - Tracy Morgan).<br /><br />In conclusion, Roxette is a severely underrated 80s band.Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6705718845778988150.post-39077633676671114072009-02-12T12:28:00.000-08:002009-02-15T09:52:54.399-08:00Boxing Ombudsman: Missing You Like CandyThe Worlds Ombudsman se gusta el boxeo.<br /><br />I am tired of the casual, unchallenged references by people that "boxing is in a decline." You can find such references to boxing's death on <a href="http://bleacherreport.com/articles/118509-ufc-vs-boxing-who-will-be-still-standing">blogs</a> and <a href="http://www.cbssports.com/columns/story/10164182">mainstream</a> sites alike, and almost always it is accompanied by no statistics or even explanation: Boxing is in a decline, everyone knows it, and mixed martial arts (MMA) is so much more popular.<br /><br />First - its not - boxing is by far still the more popular sport and is quite healthy. And second, there may be no sport with as many intriguing but under-publicized characters as there are in boxing.<br /><br />Boxing is popular. Last month's Mosely-Margarito fight brought nearly 21,000 fans to the Staples Center in LA - the largest crowd to see <span style="font-style: italic;">any</span> sporting event in the building's history (and this is the building where the Lakers play their home games). Boxing matches regularly get well over 1 million PPV buys (including a record of 2.4 million) while MMA's largest ever is 1.3 million. What about remuneration? Margarito and Mosely made $2.3 million and $1 million respectively for the aforementioned fight (although keep in mind that De La Hoya has made $45 million off of his fight with Floyd Mayweather). By comparison, the recent George St. Pierre - BJ Penn MMA fight paid those fighters $600,000 and $125,000 respectively. In 2008, Floyd Mayweather Jr. was the fourth highest paid athlete in the US - between Lebron James and Kobe Bryant.<br /><br />And that is just in the US. Around the world, boxing is thriving. In Mexico, boxing regularly gets better TV audiences than soccer -- and as for live audiences in that country - 136,000 people saw Julio Cesar Chavez fight Greg Haugen in 1993, one of the largest crowds in history, for any sport. In the UK, Ricky Hatton drew 55,000 to Manchester Stadium for his fight with Juan Lazcano and <a href="http://www.mirror.co.uk/sport/more-sport/boxing/2008/05/23/ricky-hatton-vs-juan-lazcano-record-crowd-expected-in-in-manchester-115875-20426330/">believes</a> that he will be able to break 136,000 given the right venue. Meanwhile, Manny Pacquaio is quite literally <a href="http://www.iht.com/articles/2008/12/07/asia/phils.php">the Michael Jordan of the Philippines</a>.<br /><br />In addition to being the best sport to pre-game to on a Saturday night, boxing also has some incredible storylines. Many of these story lines are routinely ignored by the mainstream US media, which is the driving force behind the claim that boxing is declining. Refuse to cover enough stories, and maybe the prophecy will be self-fulfilling. But not yet.<br /><br />Here are 5 boxers that have intriguing stories... if the press were doing its job, all but Miranda would be household names in this country in the same way that Lebron James, Tom Brady and Derrick Jeter are.<br /><br />1) The Ageless <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Akkc7KSGBto">Bernard Hopkins</a>. The Philadelphia native was sentenced to prison by his 18th birthday for countless muggings and burglaries. Upon leaving, he told the skeptical warden "I ain't coming back." After deciding that boxing would be his salvation, he had his first fight in 1988...and lost. Twenty years later, he is considered one of boxing's all-time greats. This past October, at age 43, as many boxing pundits were predicting his retirement, Hopkins shocked the world when he upset 26 year old previously undefeated middleweight champion Kelly Pavlik. How can you not love this? The only age gap that surprised me more was today when I learned that my girl Mandy Moore is <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/Music/02/12/mandy.moore.engaged/?iref=hpmostpop">engaged</a> to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGoWtY_h4xo">Bryan Adams</a>. Weird.<br /><br />2) The Columbian Slumdog Millionaire, Edison Miranda. Miranda was abandoned by his mother at one month old and essentially grew up as a street child in Buenaventura, eating stray cats and stealing to survive. At age 9 he was able to save enough money to search for and locate his mother in the countryside, only to have her reject him again. Back in the city, he began boxing at a local gym because they would let him sleep there. Fast forward 10 years -he's making six figures to knock people <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mVnzAHTOTTw">out of the ring</a>. Speaking of rings, at least <a href="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3029/2824382506_09693a9b6c.jpg?v=0">Freida Pinto</a> is still available - go to hell <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9f06QZCVUHg">Bryan Adams</a>.<br /><br />3) <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2MMSDg-gkc">Manny Pacquaio</a>, The People's Champ. The Pacman rose from poverty to be widely considered the pound-for-pound best fighter in the world as well as easily the most widely recognized celebrity in the Philippines. Pacquiao has funded countless medical clinics, schools and infrastructure work in poor areas in the Phillipines, including at one point coming back from a fight and actually handing out money to thousands of people in a poor neighborhood. So popular is Pacman, that he has already acted in movies, starred in a video game, appeared on a postage stamp and run for congress. In December he moved up significantly in weight to fight Oscar De La Hoya. Most experts predicted an easy win for the bigger De La Hoya, instead it was one of the most surprisingly one-sided fights in recent memory, as Pacquaio utterly dominated the fight, likely ending De La Hoya's career. Pacquaio is scheduled to fight Ricky Hatton in May. There have been no discussions, to my knowledge, about a future fight with the other <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2MMSDg-gkc">People's Champ</a>, <a href="http://www.dubdaily.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/paul_wall4.jpg">Paul Wall</a>. Paul Wall, incidentally, is the jeweler behind Mandy's <a href="http://www.grillsbypaulwall.com/mm5/merchant.mvc?Screen=CTGY&Category_Code=GirlGrillz">engagement grill</a>. Fact.<br /><br />4) Ricky Hatton, the Everyman. Hatton, a fighter from Manchester, England, has a band of soccer-turned-boxing hooligans who follow him all over the world, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLDL32W4Xgs">drunkenly singing, pounding drums and blowing horns</a>. Sometimes they show up at events having nothing to do with boxing and do <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZRIBDGz6mZk">this</a>. Hatton, himself, is just as amusing. Accused of drinking and eating too much between fights, Hatton regularly shows up for weigh ins (and even matches) wearing a <a href="http://www.diamondboxing.com/images/v14.jpg">fat suit</a> and calling himself Ricky Fatton. For reasons known only to him, he calls himself an honorary Mexican and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSVN10oIDkM">wears a sombrero when entering the ring while Blue Moon, the Manchester City song, plays on the loudspeakers</a>. Also, he is <a href="http://www.boxrec.com/list_bouts.php?human_id=9314&cat=boxer">nasty</a> - 45 wins with only one loss (to Floyd Mayweather). Speaking of nasty, I'm still having trouble stomaching the Mandy Moore - <a href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d0/RyanCabrera.jpg">Ryan Cabrera</a> news. Cabrera's twin brother, Steelers place kicker <a href="http://drunkathlete.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/09/jeff-reed-pittsburgh-steelers-drunk-pictures1.jpg">Jeff Reed</a>, is reportedly handling bachelor party duties.<br /><br />5) Pretty Boy <a href="http://lastrow.files.wordpress.com/2008/08/mayweather.jpg">Floyd Mayweather</a>. One of the best boxers ever and one of the most polarizing figures in all of sports, Mayweather is undefeated, untied and technically retired. But his love of<a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=68gCXzla5-c"></a> money and <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka4HIkgafsA">royal treatment</a> lead most pundits to believe that he'll be back, probably to fight Manny Pacquaio, if Pacman can beat Hatton. How much does Floyd love money? Here's him counting sweaty packets of money he keeps in a drawer and putting them in a big duffel bag, <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=68gCXzla5-c">just because</a>. My favorite part is that at one point Floyd, apparently worried that a viewer may have just tuned in and become confused and disoriented by what he or she was seeing, helpfully says "Thats seven hundred thousand... in a bag." And that's exactly what you're seeing...just bringing everyone up to speed. Is this jewels in a satchel? Is this travellers cheques in a box? Is this gold bullion in a rucksack? What is this I'm seeing? No no no...this is seven hundred thousand...in a bag. From <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4s4X2Tf5s9o">Dancing With The Stars</a>, to <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q4qWygNixsE">bizarre outings with 50 cent</a> (you'll notice Ryan Cabrera mc-ing in that clip -- come ON Mandy) Mayweather loves attention and will likely be fighting soon - stay tuned.<br /><br />In conclusion, I challenge any singer on the current <a href="http://www.billboard.com/bbcom/charts/chart_display.jsp?g=Singles&f=Hot+Adult+Top+40+Tracks">Billboard Adult/Contemporary Top 40</a> to a slap fight. You hear me Jason Mraz?<br /><br /><span style="text-decoration: underline;"></span><a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka4HIkgafsA&NR=1"><br /></a>Jonathan Quayle Higgins IIIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17400651871508758895noreply@blogger.com1